Sarcasm Book

Sarcasm Book

sarcasticallyyy

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Concluida dom, jun 24, 20188m

aboutsarcasm beingsarcastic bored funny humor

"Find some stupidity around you and I'll follow!" -Sarcasm

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Stuck In Hell With My Enemy
"What the fuck is your problem?" I asked my sworn enemy. "Have you lost your damn mind!" I scream at the top of my lungs. This bitch better answer me before I lose my shit. "HELLOO!" I get closer this time. Now I'm directly in his face screaming at him. "WILL YOU FUCKING AN- mmfp." I was suddenly cut off by his lips on mine. He pushed his tongue into my mouth, exploring every inch like he's starving. He lets me go and I have to gasp in order to catch my breath. I already know my face is flushed and red. "Are you done princess?" He asked in his dark gravely tone. Dammit if he doesn't stop with this princess thing I think I may fall in love. "Yes, now what the fuck was that for?" I took a step back, so he doesn't decide to just kiss me again. I can't do that again. I am almost one hundred percent sure my panties are soaked. "You were talking too much." Then he just walked away. God he's such an asshole! ~*~ Clara is stuck in this hell hole of a place because of the fact that her parents are blackmailing her to stay. Will she be able to find love here with a certain Kylo Miller or will she push him away because she's scared of being hurt again? I guess we'll find out together. ~*~ THIS BOOK WILL CONTAIN: Mature language Mature themes Explicit sexual scenes Mentions of death Mentions of Eating disorders
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𝘿𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙇𝙔 𝙊𝘽𝙎𝙀𝙎𝙎𝙄𝙊𝙉 || 𝙅𝙀𝙊𝙉 𝙅𝙐𝙉𝙂𝙆𝙊𝙊𝙆
𝘼 𝙈𝙖𝙛𝙞𝙖 𝙍𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 " 𝙇𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙣 𝘼𝙧𝙩. 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙬 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙞𝙘𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙡𝙮, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙩'𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚 𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙡𝙮. " ~ 𝘼𝙇𝙀𝘾𝙏𝙍𝙊𝙉𝘼 𝙀𝙑𝘼𝙉𝙎 🦋💐🖌️ " 𝙎𝙪𝙣 ! 𝘼𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙖 𝙇𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝘿𝙖𝙧𝙠 𝙉𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 , 𝙢𝙮 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝙨𝙚𝙚𝙨 𝙖 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙨𝙪𝙣𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙚! 𝙄'𝙡𝙡 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙚𝙩 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣! 𝙄 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙞𝙛 𝙞𝙩 𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙨 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙊𝙧 𝙈𝙮 𝘿𝙀𝘼𝘿𝙇𝙔 𝙊𝘽𝙎𝙀𝙎𝙎𝙄𝙊𝙉, 𝘽𝙪𝙩 𝙄'𝙡𝙡 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙢𝙮 𝙨𝙪𝙣 𝙜𝙤 𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 ! 𝙄 𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙡𝙚𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙜𝙤 𝙎𝙪𝙣! " ~ 𝙅𝙀𝙊𝙉 𝙅𝙐𝙉𝙂𝙆𝙊𝙊𝙆 🥂👄🔪 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙖 𝙙𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙨 𝙈𝙖𝙛𝙞𝙖 𝙜𝙚𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙡𝙮 𝙤𝙗𝙨𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙚𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙛𝙪𝙡 𝙬𝙞𝙛𝙚? 𝘼 𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙠 𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙞𝙩 𝙞𝙨. 𝙈𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝘼𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙙. 𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙖𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙧𝙞𝙨𝙠. 𝙄𝙛 𝙮𝙤𝙪'𝙧𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙢𝙪𝙩 𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙨𝙠𝙞𝙥 𝙞𝙩. 𝙐𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 𝙞𝙩 𝙘𝙖𝙣'𝙩 𝙗𝙚 𝙘𝙤𝙥𝙞𝙚𝙙 𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙨𝙡𝙖𝙩𝙚 .
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Aᴘᴏᴄᴀʟʏᴘsᴇ|Jsᴄʜʟᴀᴛᴛ × Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ
[𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚎] [𝚂𝙼𝚄𝚃 𝚆𝙰𝚁𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶] [𝙵𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚖: 𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚞𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜] 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚕𝚍 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚊 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚌 𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚟𝚒𝚛𝚞𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚞𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚜 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚑 𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚜. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚞𝚎𝚍 𝚋𝚢 𝚊 𝚐𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚙 𝚘𝚏 𝚋𝚘𝚢𝚜, 𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚖 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚊𝚕𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑. 𝙳𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚟𝚎? 𝙳𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚜 𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑 𝚊𝚜 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘? 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝙰𝚙𝚘𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚢𝚙𝚜𝚎 𝙰𝚄 𝙹𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚝 × 𝙵𝚎𝚖!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 [𝚂𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟻, 𝟸0𝟸𝟸] [𝙴𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚍: 𝙽𝚘𝚟 𝟷, 𝟸0𝟸𝟹] 𝙸𝙼𝙿𝚁𝙴𝚂𝚂𝙸𝚅𝙴 𝚃𝙰𝙶𝚂 #1 - philzaminecraft (𝟸0𝟸𝟺)
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Awesome Short Stories
Hey, y'all! Welcome to Awesome Short Stories! Enjoy reading them, as they will feature me, my Wattpad friends and family, and plenty of fictional characters! If you need an escape from reality, or are having a stressful time, Awesome Short Stories is the book for you!
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☆ 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐖𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬|ˢˣˢ☆
𝙶𝚡𝙶 𝙾𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚝𝚜 #𝟸 𝚘𝚗 𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚋𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚝 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔 [𝟷𝟸/𝟸𝟼/𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟺] #𝟷 𝚘𝚗 𝙼𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚋𝚢𝚖𝚎 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔 [𝟷𝟸/𝟸𝟽/𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟺] #𝟷 𝚘𝚗 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎𝚋𝚒𝚝𝚘𝚏𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 [𝟷𝟸/𝟸𝟽/𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟺] #𝟷 𝚘𝚗 𝚕𝚎𝚜𝚋𝚒𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚝 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔 [𝟷𝟸/𝟹𝟶/𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟺] #𝟷 𝚘𝚗 𝚜𝚝𝚞𝚍 𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚔 [𝟶𝟷/𝟶𝟸/𝟸𝟶𝟸𝟺]
𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐲 |✔️
"Can I ask you a question?" Alexander says looking me in the eyes while laying back and holding a blunt. "Mhm, ask away.." I replied curiously, focusing on him. "Are you a virgin?" He says looking me in the eyes. I gulped surprised at the question he just gave me. I nod innocently knowing I'm already blushin' "Yes.." I Answer, "Ye ye." He smirked sitting back inhaling his blunt. I raise my eyebrow confused then he looks back at me. "You can't be a virgin." He says staring at me. "..And why's that?" I question. "Sweetheart, you just walked past me and I'm already hard." I bite my bottom lip, "don't do that.." he trails, eyes dark. "Why.." I say looking him deep in the eyes seeing him tense up. "It does things to me..." he starts, "what things?" I say innocently, He then moves closer to me, takes my hand and puts it on his rock hard dick. I widen my eyes. He comes closer and I could feel his hot breath on my neck, then whispers in my ear, "Bad things..." ••• ⚠️mature content⚠️ ⚠️smut warning⚠️ Finished: 5th September, 2021 <3
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Bitch, You Knew?!
Book Request, Rants, Shoutouts, Follow Spree, Etc.
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Welcome To The World Of Short Stories
Hey, guys! Here is another collection of short stories, that will feature me, my Wattpad friends, my friends I know in real life, and random characters! Looking for an escape from reality? You come to the right place! Enjoy your time in the world of short stories! :)
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Tyler Talk [Complete]
The book of random shtick that I will probably update the most because I made it as an excuse to write in a book as constant as possible on wattpad and if you tried to read this out loyd you probably could not say it in one breath without involuntarily taking a breath.... I think my thumb grew a muscle when I wrote this. xD.
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Bloody War (NOW PUBLISHED IN PAPERBACK)
NOW PUBLISHED IN PAPERBACK ON AMAZON! IF YOU WANT TO ADD IT TO YOUR SHELF, JUST CLICK ON THE LINK IN MY BIO NOW!!! OR CLICK HERE:- https://www.amazon.in/dp/B0B29BRSXC/ref=cm_sw_r_wa_apa_i_VA9QRYRDJFHKP0B91JC6 ⚠️⚠️Warning ⚠️:- There are curse words, mentions of murder, pictures of bloody scenes, a little game of feelings, heavy manipulation, killing of children, bombs, guns and drugs. And yes, your female lead may not be as innocent as you prefer to read on. If you are case sensitive to any of these, please read at your own risks. Viewer discretion is advised. "She was a rogue agent. A master in worshipping her work and herself. But suddenly she disappeared, without any track. Some thought she is dead, some thought she has taken a momentarily break and some thought she was still looking out for a chance to pounce on any other gang. I don't blame them, she had a track record for doing that and she was pretty good at it." Her last kill before she vanished out of this world of war, was one of the biggest group of smugglers. Now, many other groups and rogue agents are trying to track her down for one reason or another, but in that crowd this last group which she tackled down to ashes is also included. Not revenge but something bigger. More than hard feelings, more than just a rage of vengeance. Something to gnaw at for a specific reason. Any guesses why this group is searching for it's biggest enemy? ●●●●● "Why did you refuse...?! "Beacuse...I don't want to lose the people ..I c-care for anymore..!" My eyes became wide as I realized what I said... . . ".......you.... . Care for....... . . . .....me? . . . . . . . . . A/N:- Hey there! 🙋‍♀️This is my first book and basically a trash🤦‍♀️in my humble opinion ☺ but do give it a try, maybe you'll like it. P.S: Sequel in the making 🤯 😉
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[✔︎] 𝙿𝙾𝙿𝙿𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙲𝙷𝙴𝚁𝚁𝙸𝙴𝚂 - 𝑠𝑎𝑘𝑢𝑠𝑎 𝑘𝑖𝑦𝑜𝑜𝑚𝑖
☏ 𝐏𝐎𝐏𝐏𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 . 𝐚 𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐬𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐲𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐢 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲... ✔︎ ⇨ ミ★ 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 a rather embarrassing misent sext, Y/N starts an unexpected new chapter in her life... One that includes a beautiful curly headed ravenette, and a relationship fueled by lust, sex, and is supposed to be no strings attached. ミ★ 𝐇𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐑... things get more and more confusing, when Y/N starts to fall hard. She starts thinking about what would happen if she were to actually date kiyoomi. ミ★ 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐍... just when things are starting to look up, and Y/N feels like things might actually be going somewhere, Kiyoomi ends things abruptly... ⇨ 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 & 𝐏𝐋𝐎𝐓 𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎: -𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐗𝐑𝐄𝐃- 𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐏𝐘, 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐋, 𝐎𝐑 𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀𝐍𝐘 𝐀𝐈 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐒. 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓, 𝐄𝐆: 𝐒𝐄𝐗, 𝐋𝐎𝐓𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐒𝐌𝐔𝐓. 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐒𝐌𝐔𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘.
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Life Lessons with Fleefy Doodlebug
Hi! My name is Fleefy and I guess you found my book, Life Lessons with Fleefy Doodlebug. (duh) I will be telling you about good lessons to help you in life so you can be famous! (it really works, I tried it and now you found this so I must be famous) I will show you style, how I do good in school, and lots more stuff that I can't list because this would be too long. My first life lesson is to read this book so you can be awesome! Let's show the world how we rock Doodlefans! P.S. This is not Fleefy speaking, this is Creepette162. Fleefy has taken over my Wattpad account, and I just wanna say that this book is supposed to be full of humor, so please do not be offended, this book is for fun! Thanks! I ❤️ you all! Highest rank: #481 in Humor
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Rib-cracking Jokes
Hi! Hey!! Hello!!! It's me. I was wondering if after all these years you'll like to laugh your boredom out loud. This wattpad book is full of nothing but Rib-cracking jokes. Read and laugh out loud.
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The Sex God's Trilogy
"You have no fucking idea how long I've been wanting to do this." He started with my heals as he kneeled between my legs. He removed the right one first dragging it out as he grazed my foot with his fingertips. The next one came off and my breath hitched as his gaze trained on the soaking wet spot between my legs. "Do you wax or shave?" "Wax." My voice was quiet making sure to mind my vocabulary. His intake of breath followed by his hands trailing up and up until it reached the zipper of my dress. Unzipping me he stood up to tug the dress off me to fall on the floor. My white lacy set of borrowed lingerie were fully exposed to him now and he was taking his time to look me over. As if I was some prized possession he's always wanted. He undid the white bra making my breasts bounce. "Spread your legs for me." ********* Rose Chase, dedicated med student had her entire life planned out. Until the day she walked into her apartment to find her boyfriend fucking her guy best friend. Devastated and questioning her own sexiness she rushes in the club with a vendetta a world now knew who she was.. Mason Coldwell, spoiled rotten sex god and ex friend of Rose Chase. Going out one night for a night of fun after revealing Rose's identity to the world. He goes out to a club to alleviate the old scars Rose opened up and to his surprise finds the very virgin Rose in his bed in the morning. At least she WAS a virgin. Who would have thought, the man she thought to be her demise, might be her salvation. (Mature scenes 18+ recommended to read) Highest rating #2 in romcom. ;)
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Stuck In Hell With My Enemy

"What the fuck is your problem?" I asked my sworn enemy. "Have you lost your damn mind!" I scream at the top of my lungs. This bitch better answer me before I lose my shit. "HELLOO!" I get closer this time. Now I'm directly in his face screaming at him. "WILL YOU FUCKING AN- mmfp." I was suddenly cut off by his lips on mine. He pushed his tongue into my mouth, exploring every inch like he's starving. He lets me go and I have to gasp in order to catch my breath. I already know my face is flushed and red. "Are you done princess?" He asked in his dark gravely tone. Dammit if he doesn't stop with this princess thing I think I may fall in love. "Yes, now what the fuck was that for?" I took a step back, so he doesn't decide to just kiss me again. I can't do that again. I am almost one hundred percent sure my panties are soaked. "You were talking too much." Then he just walked away. God he's such an asshole! ~*~ Clara is stuck in this hell hole of a place because of the fact that her parents are blackmailing her to stay. Will she be able to find love here with a certain Kylo Miller or will she push him away because she's scared of being hurt again? I guess we'll find out together. ~*~ THIS BOOK WILL CONTAIN: Mature language Mature themes Explicit sexual scenes Mentions of death Mentions of Eating disorders

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