"I know I haven't called you back in a week, but I had a good reason. My hands are shaking so damn hard and I can't find the words to tell you that sometimes, when two stars collide, they form a black hole. And your voice... It's my favorite song and how your lip quivers makes my bones feel like they're snapping in half. I love you too much to spit out the black hole, the sucking mass of nothing that I feel growing in my chest and in your mouth when we kiss. You are the brightest star in the sky, but my eyes are still closed--I still see myself burning out and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, but I can't kiss you tonight. I can't kiss you ever again because I'm going insane and I can't stop thinking, I can't stop shaking and I just need someone to save me. I need you to save me, but you are not here. You promised you'd take care of me. You promised--you fucking promised, and here I am, lying in my own blood and my pill tainted vomit. Make it stop, Luke. Please just make it stop."
"We're friends of course." He said smiling at me coming closer to me but I pushed him away. "No Luke. What the hell is this thing between us?" I asked and his eyes widen.
"Oh, we're friends with benefits if you want to put it that way." He said still sitting in his spot. At least the twins were with Liz so they can't be upset by this commotion
"Luke I'm sorry but I can't go on like this. It's hurting me to know that with all that's going on with the two of us, you see me as 'just a friend who you can go to and kiss and flirt with all the time'. I'm sick of that Luke, it's just hurting me and I don't want that. I already figured out what I want, so I think it's time you figure out what you want." I said while tears were streaming down my cheeks.