Repentance ✔️
  • Reads 679,270
  • Votes 19,476
  • Parts 68
  • Time 4h 18m
  • Reads 679,270
  • Votes 19,476
  • Parts 68
  • Time 4h 18m
Complete, First published Aug 12, 2018
I wasn't supposed to live.

I'm really not the best person out there.

I made mistakes, do horrible things....... mostly to them

I do think that fate is playing with me, for they want me to live again.

But this time, I am repenting, for all those things I've done.

This time, I'll act as fate and tied their red strings again.

*Hi guys! Another rebirth story. This story is a bit cliche and a bit different too in some ways. This is all about life, second chances and finally........love*
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Today I want to die. Not because of anything in particular or specific, but just because the utter thought of ceasing to exist sounds devastatingly euphoric. To make the noise stop. To stop this stabbing pain in the lowest pit of my stomach that's causing a burning sensation that crawls all over my skin, making me want to peel it off. To stop the guilt that festers every time I take a breath-- an oxygen thief. To stop the constant urge to detonate over anything and everything that dares to love me because in all-- I could never deserve such an honor. Today I want to die. For the longest time, I thought I was just unlucky. That sometimes life doesn't work out for everyone, and for people like me; things just never get better. I had settled into the life of being unlucky, reveled in it, and found comfort in knowing that no matter what; I would just be categorically unlucky. That was until I realized luck had nothing to do with it. It's karma. It's the idea of what goes around comes around, and what goes up must come down. Didn't some philosopher speak to that once? However, it isn't my karma. Well it wasn't at first-- somewhere down the line after all my wrongdoing I'm sure it has switched to mine. But I am the poor soul stuck with my father's karmic retaliation. The karma that he deserves has been thrown against me as some sort of sick cosmic joke-- I'm sure he'd actually celebrate and feast on the fact that once again, he still gets to hurt me even from his grave. Too bad I killed him before he had the chance to see. *Book One in the Karma Duet. Book Two is now in progress, titled: The Karma Study*
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ɪɢɴɪᴛᴇ

2 parts Complete Mature

ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴋɴᴇᴡ ɪ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴅᴀɴɢᴇʀᴏᴜꜱ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴇɴɢᴜʟꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰʟᴀᴍᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ʜᴇʟʟ ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ᴍʏ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. They burnt my flowers down, imagine how mad they would go when they see they grew back as thorns. They should've made sure the heavens weren't on my side when they killed me. For I have returned in devils form to claim vengeance for the girl I used to be. "Who are you?" I have built up walls of concrete, I caged that strange organ in the centre of my chest because it stands as weakness. But it is melting melting melting, my defences are crumbling, my heart is beating. It's strange. ᴅᴀɴɢᴇʀᴏᴜꜱ. No one has ever dealt with love without getting their hands burnt. ᴮᵘᵗ ᴵ ˢʷᵉᵃʳ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵘⁿⁱᵛᵉʳˢᵉ ˢʰⁱᶠᵗᵉᵈ ᵗʰᵉ ᵐᵒᵐᵉⁿᵗ ᵐʸ ᵉʸᵉˢ ᵐᵉᵗ ʰⁱˢ. "I cannot love you." "So hate me." "I tried that a long time ago." "And what happened?" "𝘐 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘥." They spent years torturing me, teaching me I was unlovable, a monster incapable of loving. So I believed love was much like sand, an unattainable something which would slip through my fingers the moment I tried to grasp it. But now my battered heart gnaws its way out my body, pouncing into my stained hands, begging, pleading, falling on its goddamn knees as it tells me: '𝚍𝚘𝚗'𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏𝚒𝚜𝚑, 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚢.' TW.⚠️