It's a Tuesday morning in February, and I get up as usual, and I stumble into the bathroom to take a shower in the dark. Which is my school-day method because it's sort of like an extra ten minutes of sleep. It's after the shower. That's when it happens. It's when I turn on the bathroom light and wipe the fog off the mirror to comb my hair. It's what I see in the mirror. It's what I don't see. I look a second time, and then rub at the mirror again. I'm not there. That's what I'm saying. I'm. Not. There.