Haruhi
- Reads 140
- Votes 3
- Parts 3
Ongoing6m
Last published Fri, Nov 2, 2018
A sort of journal for my struggles with loss, depression and life itself. I want to help and encourage others who feel those awful feelings and offer advice as well.
All Rights Reserved
#86
coping
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Noah (Obsessions in Overdrive #1)
I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life. I want to be in my suit, in my coffin, in the ground and my soul to be gone. I've been waiting for 16 years, yet no sign of death opening his door no matter how many times I ring his doorbell. Yeah, I enjoy thinking about my end. Especially at moments like this... *** #1 physical #1 cuteguys #1 addiction #2 self-esteem *** Started: 7 November 2022 Finished: 18 April 2024Complete![The Trouble with Trust [COMPLETED]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/240554796-256-k368525.jpg)
The Trouble with Trust [COMPLETED]
I'm about to tell you a story about a girl. A normal girl. A girl that had no cares in the world, until her trust for it was stripped away. When you read her story, you'll find yourself trusting her, loving her, rooting for her. But you see, not everyone gets to trust the world. Not everyone has a happy ending. --- Halfway through the kiss however, his attitude changed; instead of being a loving embrace, it became a fierce trap. His grip on her waist tightened, trapped her where she was instead of simply holding her where he wanted her. The hand in her hair grabbed a section of it, enforcing his demand for her not to go anywhere. Before she knew what was happening, he left go of her hair, and pushed her to the ground. She gasped, suddenly able to breathe. He stood up and walked over to her. He placed a soft hand on her cheek, just like he used to when he was telling her how special she was to him. None of the emotion was there this time however, all she could feel radiating from his was rage. "You shouldn't have run off, babe," he said bitterly. "I was about to show you how much I loved you. Instead, I now have to show you what happens when you anger me." --- The men regarded her, before she was shoved to the ground and one produced a whip. There, laying broken on the floor, as the other girls watched, she was whipped. Slowly, she felt her skin breaking in time with her heart and her will.Complete
Logan
*TW* Contains topics and scenes of sexual assault, self-harm, abuse.* "You know you loved every second of it," I can feel the tears welling up as well as the anger building up within me. I stare at him for a while before I have to turn away from his hungry gaze. "Look I just came here to tell you that I forgive you for what you did back in Cali and I'll take you back," "You forgive me?" I yell. "I did nothing to you. You raped me! You fucking raped me! You have no right to come here and tell me that. You. Forgive. Me. You traumatized me. What you did to me tore me up inside and was eating away at me until I tried to kill myself. And when I told people they didn't believe me. I had to listen to so many people talk about how great a guy you were and how I clearly just regretted sleeping with you. You are a monster. You made me hate myself for something that was never my fault. You have caused me so much pain and suffering," I pause to take a deep breath. "So you don't get to come here to my school and tell me you forgive me. You don't get to make me feel bad about coming forward. The only thing I regret is ever thinking you were a good person." _____________________________________________ Logan Young is a 16-year-old girl about to start her senior year in a brand new town. The past year has been tough and her family moved to give her a fresh start. Her life before the move had been hard and she had been spiraling. She quickly makes new friends and even enemies. She builds up walls to protect herself. But what happens when an unlikely person helps her to tear down her walls and heal. Will she be able to survive in this new place and keep her secrets intact?Complete
The Words I couldn't Say
This is a place for me to put all the things I wish I said but I just couldn't. These are a way for me to "say" these things without actually saying them to the person I want to. I probably won't ever go back or read any of these because it's like revisiting a bad memory so don't expect much in terms of editing. Also I wouldn't consider this poetry but it is laid out that way. WARNING Talk of depression, suicide, anxiety, and self harm. Don't read if you don't like things like that and may get triggered. I don't mean to cause anyone problems of any sort, but these are the things I feel and can't help. Please keep negativity away as this is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. Thank you. Highest rankings: 99 in sadpoems Highest rankings: 118 in iwannadieComplete
Self-Destruction
Fake a smile, No one knows you're broken. Fake a smile, it's easier than trying to explain why you're sad. Fake a smile, lie and say you're fine, it's easier then trying to explain why you do what you do. Quotes, Stories, Entries and Poems about what it's like to be depressed, alone, suicidal etc...Complete
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Complete
Family Comes First
Being alone? Check. Being afraid? Check. Being abused? Check times 3. Honestly, my life wasn't this bad before, not until I ended in foster care... SIKE! My life was always bad. From the moment I was born, I lived with an abusive father who blamed me for my mother's death, and even I couldn't disagree with him. Here are a few questions I am constantly asked: 'Do I do well in school?' No, are you kidding me? The only subject I'm good at is Visual Arts. 'Do I have a kind and caring family?' No, I don't think I do. 'Do I have anyone who cares about me?' No, I'm a loner and socially awkward. 'Do I have privileges?' No, if you haven't understood the message yet, I live in an abusive household. Now, you might ask if there are any questions the answer is yes. I'll give you some. 'Do I want to die?' Yes, I sometimes do. 'Do I feel alone in this world?' Yes, always. 'Do I get a beating every day?' Yes. *** This is Amara Williams, a 13 year-old with average grades and no friends. What happens when her only guardian, her dad, is dead? What happens when she finds out that she has five older brothers who are not only strict and demanding, but also protective assholes? More importantly, what happens when she finds out that she was taught lies from the moment she was born? Follow Amara as she digs deeper into her family history, uncovering the secrets and discovering the lies. ___ ⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ There will be mentions of abuse, r@pe, self harm, death, and many other dark themes. I have given a warning now, and I will give a TW in each chapter when reading for safety reasons. However, I want all of my readers to know what to expect so that they can decided for themselves if they want to read. Read at your own discretion! ____ Highest Rankings: #1 in Rules: Oct. 18. 2020 #1 in Truth: Jan. 16. 2021 #1 in Alcohol: Jun. 18. 2021Complete
It's Okay to Use Your Big Girl Voice
Inside you will find a mixture of both, extremely RAW and refreshingly HEALING accounts of my personal war with my past. Unfortunately, Childhood sexual abuse is far too common, and many of share similar experiences. Looking back, what I could have used more than anything was someone to tell me "You're not alone, there is a lightness through the darkness, you can heal from this and most importantly don't EVER stop telling your story to make others comfortable". I've learned that silence is the best weapon for a predator, and I for one, have never been really good at doing what I'm told. I don't intend on starting now. I wear my scar as reminder that I hold the power in my own story, it is mine to tell and I won't make myself sick keeping quiet because my truths are hard to swallow, other people's comfort is not my problem. My Goal is rather simple, to let the readers know, they too are not alone. If you are a survivor, even if you still feel like a victim, this is my personal message to you. "You are strong, and it wasn't your fault. Tell someone... tell anyone...tell everyone... We shift from victims to survivors when we speak up and tell our stories. There's nothing wrong with you, and the light will shine again. The longer you sit in silence the more power your abuser still holds over you, wipe your face warrior, because there's a lion right inside of you, DONT EVER GIVE UP!" *This story is FULL of TRIGGERS, please be careful reading if triggers are hard for you, your mental health matters* *I own all the Rights to all parts of this book*
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I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life. I want to be in my suit, in my coffin, in the ground and my soul to be gone. I've been waiting for 16 years, yet no sign of death opening his door no matter how many times I ring his doorbell. Yeah, I enjoy thinking about my end. Especially at moments like this... *** #1 physical #1 cuteguys #1 addiction #2 self-esteem *** Started: 7 November 2022 Finished: 18 April 2024
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