Blackbird

Blackbird

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Wed, May 12, 2021
It was as if the calculator of time had stopped working and I was surrounded by a feeling I had never felt before; self-doubt. For the first time in my life, I could not conjure up an explanation based on logic. 'Magic.' I heard the little voice of self-doubt whisper to me at the back of my head but I was prompt in shutting it up. Magic didn't exist, it could never exist. EVERYTHING has an explanation. But for everything in me, I could not think of any to justify time freezing subtly as I fell. And as I stared up at him with gritted teeth, feeling like my knowledge was being threatened by his doing, I felt myself slipping away from everything I believed. And something told me it was only going to get worse.
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They say the mind is maze of unknown insanity. A place where you don't know how wrong you are until it's too late. I felt myself crumbling and drifting away into what I always feared. Turning into the monster under the bed instead of the scared child under the covers. It was drowning me fast, taking me under, until I started breathing it like oxygen. Until it had me hooked by the neck, and I couldn't make my escape. I don't know how he found me or why he stayed by my side. I just know his love was so intoxicating, that it saved me. And I know his love was so addicting, that it killed me. Or maybe I was dead all along.

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