Eventually

Eventually

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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Mon, Sep 24, 2018
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Fiction
Social Themes
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But Eventually I'll be okay. Eventually I will be back to normal. Ya know the normal where you pretend to be okay and you're back to faking smiles. Eventually I will be able to eat without feeling sick. Eventually I will stop crying and breaking down because I lost my best friend. Eventually I will be okay. Eventually you will not be the only thing on my mind. Eventually I'll be able to sleep without constantly waking up. Eventually I won't lay on the floor with Dan and Shay on repeat. Eventually i won't be waiting on advice from my deceased grandmother. Eventually my mom won't be worried. However, I will always feel like I could have tried harder, I will not be open to new relationships so easily. I will always be more conscious of everything. And I will always feel like I failed our friendrelationship of not boyfriend boyfriend and vice versa. I will feel like I should've tried harder. I'll always remember this when I'm driving home and thinking I'll call him. Oh wait we aren't talking much anymore. Then I'll look at old messages I saved and feel like crap all over again. But good news I will eventually be able to fake it like I'm okay again.
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In life, we do things we regret, or that we wish we could wipe from our memory forever. At the age of 15, I didn't think I'd regret anything until I was an adult. I considered myself care free. I lived life one day at a time. Well, as much as a 15 year old can. But in life, there are also things that we can't change, that we can't forget. Circumstances change, events occur, and life as we know it is altered forever. For me, it was one night, that set in motion a series of events that I wouldn't be able to forget, even if I tried to. *************************** My life was spectacular, or cool, but I was content, and that's all that mattered. I wasn't overly popular, I wasn't the prettiest girl, and I didn't live in a mansion. I did have a great boyfriend, and amazing friends, and hell, I wasn't doing too bad in school either. But that all changed one night, as I was walking home at night. I witnessed a man murder someone he claimed was a snitch, something to do with a gang deal gone wrong. When I found my parents dead the next day in a serial killers wet dream, my naive self decided the best thing I could do, was run, giving up everything I loved. After 2 years, 3 dead members of the gang and a new school, I was found. When secrets are unraveled and with the FBI somehow involved, nothing is as it ever seemed.

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