1/5/17
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- Parts 1
Personal experience that almost destroyed me but turned out to be my saving grace, allowed me to re evaluate my life and put things in perspective. It's allowed me to appreciate the things I love and helped me get over this writers block I've had for over 2 years at this point. Speaking about it now will help set me free, and sharing it will hopefully show others they're not alone.
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Behind My Eyes.
come pick my mind and stay awhile, make yourself comfortable. it's awfully lonely in here. - inside this book, you'll find five distinct parts: simply me, which tells you almost everything you need to know about me. you, which tells you about my experience with love and the state of bliss it brings you. after you, which tells you about my experience with heartbreak and hate. nightmares, which is every scary thing that occurs in my mind and things that instill fear in those who read it. the book closes with recovery, where we explore self-confidence and self-discovery. these are the inner workings of my mind, i'm not going to sugar coat it for you: it's a sad, depressing place. this all comes from the pages of my journals so i'm sparing you the tear-stained pages, consider yourself lucky. hope you enjoy! - feel free to comment or message me :)Complete
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Enemies-to-lovers * Bickering/bantering Boss/employee * Romantic comedy with a HEA He says I'm a hemorrhoid and a massive dark cloud without a silver lining. I consider him a bosshole and heartless prick--because that's what he is and more. I've never met my boss. He works only through emails. I was two months in at my new job, when I had to fly to Florida to bury my grandmother. The night of her funeral, an overly hot man approached me while I was in the middle of trying to meet a deadline, wondering if I'd be interested in having a wild night with him. It had been a couple years since I Iast been with a man. I was pissed at my boss, and he was good looking, so I accepted his offer. Next, I emailed my boss telling him I wasn't making the deadline because I was going to get laid. And I did... lots of it. The next morning he was gone. Months later, I run into my boss--in the dark--on masquerade night at a sex club. Let's just say we had an interesting moment. After that I wanted to kill him more than I already wanted to. Weeks later. I had the shock of my life when we met face to face at my best friends wedding. Callum's a one-and-done type of guy. And I wasn't looking for love either. But our friends had other plans for us. They thought we were the perfect match and did all they could to set us up. Will us two stubborn hotheads see we're meant to be? Credit for cover: https://selfpubbookcovers.com/RLSatherComplete
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐓𝐞𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
"I'm a devil Ira think before you say anything", he replied staring into her soul "I don't care if I fall in love with a devil, as long as that devil will love me the way he loves hell", she said maintaining the eye contact "Your angel eyes see the good in a devil 𝘮𝘪 𝘢𝘮𝘰𝘳", he strolled towards her with long steps "And the sweet little angel couldn't keep her eyes off the devil", she titled her head sideways when he grabbed her neck harshly yet carefully not to hurt her but "You are fucking impetuous and daring, a little too bold and way too fucking fearless. You are my sickening Temptation, in my veins like a pretty poison", he didn't even waited for her to reply shutting her off by smashing his lips on hers devouring her like a secret or a sin. He had this look in his eyes how he owns her how she belongs to him. But for her he can he can kill and get killed would burn down the world for her but not let a single flame touch her. She hold the power to make the Lord of Darkness kneel before her. 𝐇𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐅𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐲--- 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐜 𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧. || Mature and Triggering content || Read at your own discretion.Complete
Evolution
There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.Complete
YOU NEVER EXPECT
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poetry
trigger warning. dont expect you to read this, words are simply that. just words. but if you do i hope you enjoy 👍 and if you relate to any of these, im so sorry. (all of these are original and written by me unless its said otherwise) might also include random rambles and/or thoughts or maybe even quotes (sorry again abt this)
It's Okay to Use Your Big Girl Voice
Inside you will find a mixture of both, extremely RAW and refreshingly HEALING accounts of my personal war with my past. Unfortunately, Childhood sexual abuse is far too common, and many of share similar experiences. Looking back, what I could have used more than anything was someone to tell me "You're not alone, there is a lightness through the darkness, you can heal from this and most importantly don't EVER stop telling your story to make others comfortable". I've learned that silence is the best weapon for a predator, and I for one, have never been really good at doing what I'm told. I don't intend on starting now. I wear my scar as reminder that I hold the power in my own story, it is mine to tell and I won't make myself sick keeping quiet because my truths are hard to swallow, other people's comfort is not my problem. My Goal is rather simple, to let the readers know, they too are not alone. If you are a survivor, even if you still feel like a victim, this is my personal message to you. "You are strong, and it wasn't your fault. Tell someone... tell anyone...tell everyone... We shift from victims to survivors when we speak up and tell our stories. There's nothing wrong with you, and the light will shine again. The longer you sit in silence the more power your abuser still holds over you, wipe your face warrior, because there's a lion right inside of you, DONT EVER GIVE UP!" *This story is FULL of TRIGGERS, please be careful reading if triggers are hard for you, your mental health matters* *I own all the Rights to all parts of this book*
𝙱𝚛𝚞𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚍 𝙵𝚛𝚞𝚒𝚝
An accumulation of the notes app on my phone over the past 7 years ♕ Highest ranked #18 in short novel #54 in poetry #176 in sexual assault #260 in poemsComplete
The Maddest Obsession
"He'd burn the whole world down till he could dig me out of the ashes." I was ready to start a new life. After graduating at the top of my class, I finally had everything. My apartment. My gallery. A perfect boyfriend. Basically, I was living my dream life and I was loving every second of it. But then in came him. And then chaos occurred. All great love stories were supposed to have a happy ending. Mine did too, until he came along. This is the tale of how he found me, how he stole me, and how he lost me. I was a damsel, one who already had her white knight. But every fairy tale had a villain, someone waiting in the wings to rip it all down. A scoundrel who would set the world on fire if that meant he got what he wants. It was me. He wanted me. You know, they say it was bad when you fall for the wrong guy, but the thing was, it was worse when the wrong guy falls for you. WARNING: Contains sensitive topics like cheating. Also contains mature/sexual content and situations that some people might find offensive so it is intended for mature audience only. [18+ content]Complete
come pick my mind and stay awhile, make yourself comfortable. it's awfully lonely in here. - inside this book, you'll find five distinct parts: simply me, which tells you almost everything you need to know about me. you, which tells you about my experience with love and the state of bliss it brings you. after you, which tells you about my experience with heartbreak and hate. nightmares, which is every scary thing that occurs in my mind and things that instill fear in those who read it. the book closes with recovery, where we explore self-confidence and self-discovery. these are the inner workings of my mind, i'm not going to sugar coat it for you: it's a sad, depressing place. this all comes from the pages of my journals so i'm sparing you the tear-stained pages, consider yourself lucky. hope you enjoy! - feel free to comment or message me :)
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