When you are an avid fan you write things from your heart, stating things like being with your idol forever and how much you love them. It's impossible for them to happen in reality. Your idol doesn't know you exist and there you are writing letters to express your feelings knowing there's no way he can read it. You write things on how much you idolize, adore, support and love them.
Well, that's the life of fangirls. Let them be! They will stop writing love letters to them once they find their real life love. Eventually! Like me! As I read back the letters I happily wrote years ago, I found out how romantic I am. I even asked myself, 'How in the world did I ever write them?' It baffled me! Did I write them? Maybe I was possessed by a spirit, my past life? Then a thought struck me, I'm a writer! :P
Those very sweet words and things I feel them to my hubby for almost six months. There's a big difference now. He knows I exist. We made memories together. We plan to spend the rest of our lives together forever. I'm madly, crazily and truly in love with him.
Where's Yuchae who find Korean men attractive? *slowly hides* Ahahaha! To be honest, adoring Kpop idols and other men is not in my vocabulary anymore. I adore my fiance more than those people I watch on TV and stage. The love I have for him is the strongest! I stop fangirling! I have all my attention and affection to my hubby. :*
I'm still a Kpop fan and will always be. I still listen to Korean songs and watch Korean movies and dramas. No one can take the love of doing them away from me! I've been loving Kpop, Korean dramas and movies for 12 years and I would never think of turning my back to them. They've been with me through sad and happy days. I decided to minimize my fangirling life. sad and happy days. I decided to minimize my fangirling life. I'm so outdated and being updated to Kpop world isn't necessary anymore. I don't even know the rookies, new dramas, actors, actresses and singers.
Party Planner?...Check...single?...Check... Ex boyfriend?...Check... son?... check.
Everything on my own? Check check check a 1000 times.
Where are you now that I need you? Couldn't find you anywhere
When you broke down, I didn't leave ya, I was by your side
So where are you now that I need ya?
You were nowhere to be found... leaving me behind just so you can follow your dreams. or maybe you had another girl on the side.
Finding out I was pregnant but when I was going to tell you, you ignored me and left me behind. Didn't bother even calling me. I wanted to tell you the good news. But you had other plans in store.
But who would've thought after a 5 years later, we would run into each other. at the same place and time? was this fate? but why would you care anyways. You hurt me more than anything. It's not like you still love me
Or maybe you still do...but it's the lies and promises you break that draws me away.
I thought I could do things on my own. But I guess not.
I think... I still want you...but is it really too late as I say it is?
I still love you...need you....and to be with not just me... But our son as well.
Why did you have to walk back into my life? It just makes everything so confusing and hard. Just trying to forget you. Which I can't.
Maybe this time it's going to be different and could be the start of something new. A chance to start over and repair what is broken.
But it's only up to you..and only a little bit of time. Before I give up. Which I haven't done yet. I still have faith.
Let's just see where this takes us. Maybe this time we will last forever. And it won't be the end.
Mature Content
smut
language
Fluff