Onyxmuse Critiques! - Onyx Muse - Wattpad

Onyxmuse Critiques!

Reads 324
Votes 21
Parts 3
Time <5 mins

Reads 324
Votes 21
Parts 3
Time <5 mins

critique help poetry readforread reads review romance story teenfiction

Highest Achieved  #182 in critique and #118 in review 

Just as the title says, I'm here to critique your stories just for the heck of it. If you're interested in an honest opinion, come right in with your defenses at bay for possible crushing (in a nice way mind you!) and see what I have to offer.All Rights Reserved

critique help poetry readforread reads review romance story teenfiction

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The Diary of Me by lyssagibson

I have marked this story as "completed" but I don't know if it will ever actual be complete. This is my journal, my secrets, my thoughts. This is The Diary of Me.

My Brother is my Mate!! by aaminah98

This is NOT a story about incest so please don't get the wrong idea. Disclaimer: I made this book when I was like 12 so just beware lol "Blake how the heck are you my m-mate?" I say with the courage that I have left, which isn't very much. "Kennedy I've waited for this moment since last year." "What do you mean?" I ask while looking down at the floor avoiding his eyes. "I mean that I have known that you were my mate since I shifted but I didn't tell you, and now you finally know", he states as he comes closer and closer until we are so close I can feel his breathe on my cheek. "U-um Blake what are you doing?", I say as he looks at my lips and I gaze at his blue-green eyes. "Something I have waited way too long to do", He says as his lips come crashing onto mine. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kennedy is a 16 year old girl. Her birthday is in 2 weeks and it will be her turn to find her mate. Also she will finally shift into her wolf. But on her birthday she will find something out that will change her life completely, not only will she find her mate but she will find something about her that will change her future..... Read to find out :) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Book Cover made by @Weirdness_Rules Highest Rank: #17 in Werewolf

my way of saying goodbye to you by r4iqii

this is really just me writing about my recent break up to cope with it, read if you want to, it's just to practice my writing skills. most of there ARE going to be short, so dont expect some sort of poetic letter every single time.. i basically have the reading level of a 5th grader so don't expect much💀 update as of 03/07/25: now it's just a lil diary of my life after breaking up with my recent boyfriend.. (HELP)

Ari's Reverse Harlem by AMGabie

*Hey guys this is my first time writing. All critiques are welcome! Please comment any suggestions so I can get better! Thanks for reading.* Ari has grown up sheltered. She didn't know that outside her pack there's unrest across America. Vampires are addicted to wolf's blood, Mages are addicted to power and Rogues are addicted to blood lust. Ari has a strong wolf, one that comes early. To everyone's surprise, she's a golden wolf. A golden wolf hasn't been seen in centuries. She's blessed with lunar magic, she can manipulate earth, water and gravity. Now everyone is expecting her to save the werewolf/lycan world. Once discovered, her and her pack realizes she's no longer safe. She is now a prize who many will kill over to have by their side or just kill to get out of their way. Follow Ari through her journey to discover and learn her new powers along with the men that will give their lives to make sure she's safe. *Medium burn *Sexual Content *Adult Language *Violence

Outcast Reject by -Leonard

I was never appreciated for who I was. I was tossed aside and left to rot for a mistake I made many years ago, a mistake that haunted me my entire life. I thought he would be the one to save me, how wrong I was. My story is not an easy one but it is one that shaped me to be the person who I am today. *Extended summary inside* ******** DISCLAIMER... This book was written a while back ago when I was younger and did not understand proper English grammar. It is not the best written book out there but I hope that does not discourage you from reading the book. Although it is not the best, it does have a somewhat decent, yet a little cliche, storyline.

Crushed Underneath the Surface by Michelle_90210

For years, I've been writing in silence, creating worlds, characters, and stories that lived only in the margins of my notebooks and tucked-away folders on my computer. Writing has always been my escape, something I've done for myself-a way to step out of reality for a moment and breathe through the lives of the people I've imagined. I've written and rewritten countless stories, always hesitant to share them, never quite confident enough to let anyone else peek into the depths of my mind. It's always felt like just a hobby, something personal, something safe. But deep down, I've carried a quiet dream of becoming a writer, even though it felt a little foolish to hope for something so big. Now, after pouring myself into this story for what feels like a lifetime, I've finally done it-I've uploaded all my chapters to Wattpad, sharing this piece of me with the world. I know I still have so much to learn, and I'm always striving to get better, but I would truly appreciate any feedback-good, constructive criticism that can help me grow. This is just the beginning, but it feels like a huge step forward. Thank you for taking a chance on this book. Whatever brought you here, whether it was curiosity, a recommendation, or just a moment of wandering, I am truly grateful.

My Life, My Alpha.......My Love by cookielover135

"Zachary." I snickered. He growled playfully as I laughed, dodging his attempt to grab me and took off running in a random direction. I ran with Zac right on my heels, until I turned a corner and ran into a hard chest. I prepared myself for a hard fall, when two muscular arms shot out, wrapping around my waist and crushing my body against theirs. "Hello, beautiful." The person said. I looked up to see a handsome boy, probably around seventeen also. His face looked oddly familiar and while trying to figure out why, I froze. His face was inching closer and closer to mine. I could feel his breath wash over my face as his lips was parted, only inches away from my face, eyes closing slightly, when suddenly a fierce growl shot out through the silence, that had my body tingling. In a flash I was out of the mysterious boy's hold and my hand instantly reached out to steady myself. I looked up to see Zac, pinning the boy by his throat, on a nearby wall. "Keep your filthy hands to yourself, she's MINE!!!!"He growled possessively. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My name is Jessica Matthews, i'm 17 and i'm a werewolf..not only that but the alpha's daughter.My life was perfect, i had an amazing family which consisted of my parents, my older brother Jared and I, I had a wonderful bestfriend, Stacey and, even though he wasn't my mate, a perfect boyfriend, Dylan, or at least i thought so, until one night he does something unforgivable and my mate waltzes in as my knight in shining armor. But what happens when Dylan won't let me go so easily and insists that i'm his. It also does nothing to help the fact that my mate is possessive and won't let anyone have what's his. Follow me on this journey of love, lust, hurt and betrayal...and hopefully...A HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!!

Alpha's Baby | astera22 by astera22

My mum always used to tell me what it's like to see your mate for the first time. She used to say that at that moment, everything around you stopped, that nothing else mattered. And nothing else would matter. If it wasn't for the little girl clinging to my leg right now. That little girl that trusts me with her life, that beautiful little girl that made me hold on and not give up on life. That little girl, whose father is standing in front of me right now. He's my mate. The edges of his lips curve and he looks up and down as if checking me out. "Long time no see." Are the words that first come out of his mouth that break the silence. ~~~~~~~~~~ Lexie is an Alpha's daughter. She faces a hard few days and thinks a night at the club will help her get through this. A few drinks won't hurt, right? At least that's what she thinks. Yet that night will change everything sooner than she would ever imagine. When the next day, her pack gets attacked, everything is chaos. Her mother and father are killed and her world shatters. She's forced to run away and leave everyone that she still has left behind. She thinks she has no one... that's until she finds out about another heartbeat in her body. Raising a baby on your own is hard enough. After a few years she finally meets her mate though and it turns out she knows him after all. How will she confess that her mate is actually her daughter's father? What will happen now? We don't live in a fairy tale where every story has a happy ending though. Real world isn't that easy...if you can call a world full of mystical creatures very real.

Lunar (alpha x rouge)completed Unfinished by Luna1265

This story has strong language and maybe one day explicit content as of now tho there is none. It's my first story I love constructive criticism. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lunar who goes by luna. She is a 17 year old female. Shes different from the rest, She's a werewolf but not only that her eyes change color with her emotions. She has no parents you will find out why in the story. She get a foster parent that actually treats her like a living being and moves. In this new town she encounters a pack that lives there and there alpha. Will they kill her for being a rogue or will so magic and heartache happen? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I don't want to give away to much so here's where it ends for now. This is my idea. Do not use without asking permission and if someone idea is in here I honestly didn't know because I'm coming up with this story on my own

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Slide 1 of 9

The Diary of Me cover

My Brother is my Mate!! cover

my way of saying goodbye to you cover

Ari's Reverse Harlem cover

Outcast Reject cover

Crushed Underneath the Surface cover

My Life, My Alpha.......My Love cover

Alpha's Baby | astera22 cover

Lunar (alpha x rouge)completed Unfinished cover

The Diary of Me

I have marked this story as "completed" but I don't know if it will ever actual be complete. This is my journal, my secrets, my thoughts. This is The Diary of Me.