The Gain of the Loss

Reads 354
Votes 16
Parts 2
Time 12m

Reads 354
Votes 16
Parts 2
Time 12m

anorexia bulimia cry eatingdisorder fat nervosa sad selfhate skinny thegainoftheloss upset

"Up to 24 million of all ages and genders suffer from an eating disorder(anorexia, bulimia, binge-eating disorder)."

I never thought that stat would have anything to do with me. And, now, here I was, unable to look at myself in the mirror without seeing piles and pounds of fat that could be shed off. 'When I'm skinny, I'll stop,' I tell myself. But it never works. I'm still fat, I'm still ugly, and for some reason, I'm still eating.

I don't care if I die. I don't care if I starve myself to death, because that just means I succeeded. I want to take up the least amount of space I can. 

"The bones stick out and sing to my eyes, that beautiful light shines between my thighs, for I am finally as skinny as skinny can be."All Rights Reserved

anorexia bulimia cry eatingdisorder fat nervosa sad selfhate skinny thegainoftheloss upset

Table of contents

2 parts

#113skinny

Content Guidelines

You may also like

Ella is falling apart trying to live a "perfect" high school life. Then she meets Ren, who can see past her scars. Suddenly perfection isn't her only option. ***** Ella Volkov is a gifted music student, but she's depressed and starting to crack under the pressure of high school. Her overbearing father won't even let her choose what instrument she plays. Then she finds herself alone at a party with Ren, her best friend's crush. She'd always thought he was rude, but after that night he's all Ella can think about. Now she's trapped. If Ella dates Ren, it will ruin her friendship with Jenny. But if she stays true to Jenny, she's losing the one person who can see past her scars. It's up to Ella to decide if she will forge her own path, or stay in the "perfect" box designed for her... Content and/or Trigger Warning: depression, anxiety, self-harm, violence, sexual assault. [[word count: 50,000-100,000 words]]

A Perfect Circle

Ella is falling apart trying to live a "perfect" high school life. Then she meets Ren, who can see past her scars. Suddenly perfection isn't her only option. ***** Ella Volkov is a gifted music student, but she's depressed and starting to crack under the pressure of high school. Her overbearing father won't even let her choose what instrument she plays. Then she finds herself alone at a party with Ren, her best friend's crush. She'd always thought he was rude, but after that night he's all Ella can think about. Now she's trapped. If Ella dates Ren, it will ruin her friendship with Jenny. But if she stays true to Jenny, she's losing the one person who can see past her scars. It's up to Ella to decide if she will forge her own path, or stay in the "perfect" box designed for her... Content and/or Trigger Warning: depression, anxiety, self-harm, violence, sexual assault. [[word count: 50,000-100,000 words]]

More details