Please Talk about Me When I'm Gone

Please Talk about Me When I'm Gone

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Question: How do you get over it? Answer: You don't. You don't want to. It makes you who you are. Sean Murphy lost his mother days after her fifty-ninth birthday, following a five-year battle with cancer. In this eloquent memoir, he explores his family history through the context of grief, compassion, faith, and the cultivation of an artistic sensibility. Unfolding in a range of voices, brutal and tender in its portrayal of terminal illness, Please Talk about Me When I'm Gone is an unyielding love story, in which devotion and memory are capable of transcending death. I will be serializing this memoir with a new chapter twice a week, on Friday and Sunday.
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There's no easy way to say this, so let's just get it out of the way: this is the story of how my son died. There. Like ripping off the Band-Aid. Not easy or painless, but quick. Unlike ripping off a Band-Aid, though, that pain doesn't fade. It leaves a scar. It's something that follows you around, day after day, twisting its way through every moment and every interaction. It's something that defines you. You lose a bit of yourself when something like that happens, and I don't mean just the actual loss of your own flesh and blood. For me, I stopped being a dad. I spent years and years as a dad, and then he died and I wasn't a dad anymore.

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