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Disasterology

Reads 1,021
Votes 19
Parts 9
Time 48m

Reads 1,021
Votes 19
Parts 9
Time 48m

aingst alexandria anorexia asking cutters emo esteam hate love low music pierce punk self veil

Never, never in my life have I ever been one of the crowd. I’ve always been unusual. It’s not that I’m not willing to change it’s that I’m not capable. That’s what scared me the most. I try to be different, by that meaning I tried being the same, but it was a fruitless endeavor.  I am stuck in my ways and had been sense birth. I have problems, I’m not going to deny it. I might be fucked up in the head but I know four things. I know my place in society, I know who I am, I’m a damn good friend and I never ever break a promise.
	Now that you know a little bit about me its time you know a little bit about me. My full name is Alexandria Dawn Joz-lin Kestrel. An intense name I’m aware, but I go by Alex. Simple, easy to remember and not quite as hard to live up to as Alexandria. I have three addictions and three vices. I’m addicted to music, photography and Tumblr. My vices are much much darker and much much more enthralling, so much so in fact that I feel I must keep them to myself. Like I’ve said before I have problems. But I didn’t pore my heart out onto paper so that you can hear about me and all of the things that make me a freak, I did it so you would know my story.All Rights Reserved

aingst alexandria anorexia asking cutters emo esteam hate love low music pierce punk self veil

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9 parts

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Just A Thought by juayxx

Something tragic has happened. A 17 year old Valeri has to move to her dad's place. She spent all her life thinking he was dead. Her now dead mother told her that. Not knowing she has a twin brother she flies over the country and meets him there. She comes back into lives of people she once knew and loved. Not just her family. But someone else. A boy who took care of her when she was struggling. Her best friend. Valeri is dealing with addictions and when something at her new home happens, she sinks even lower. It might not end well for her. But she has friends now. Her kind brother, two funny friends and someone else she once knew... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heyy! This is my first book. 1. I want to make it clear that English is not my first language and there might be writing mistakes. 2. ⚠️BEFORE YOU START READING CHECK TWs BELOW⚠️ 3. I myself struggle with an addiction and I think writing this book will help me process everything. That's another reason why I'm doing it. 4. You're welcome to comment but leave if you're here to write hate comments. I don't care what you think. 5. If you're here just for smut this is not a book for you. There might be some scenes but not many. This story is about struggling, dealing and fighting with addictions. 6. I'll post a new chapter every few days. I have a lot of schoolwork but I'll try my best. ⚠️TRIGGER WARNINGS: panic and anxiety attacks, self harm, sexual assault and rape, eating disorder, drinking and smoking, weed, pills, drug addiction, overdose, suicide attempt, depression, ptsd, swearing, mature content TROPES: -childhood best friend -friends to lovers -brother's best friend -who did this to you? -one bed trope I'LL PROBABLY ADD SOME MORE I hope you'll enjoy it!

The Edge of Tomorrow by Aia_Je

Born into a prestigious family, Elijah had to shoulder a lot of things- pride, family name, being the best of the best... These things were not what he wanted. As his family pushed him to the top, he gained everything that everybody ever wanted, power, fame, and wealth. People were jealous, resentful, bitter of his achievements, they all wanted to be just like him. Beneath these cloaks was a man who longed for love, affection, happiness... But never has he gotten even a single drop of it. Trying to cast aside his past, he reincarnated after he died in a cold-blooded war. Still wanting love, affection, and happiness, he now seeks to get it all. In a world filled with magic, monsters, and swords he wants a chance to meet his desires in his second life. Now born as Alexander Hollows, he will create a path full of life... But never has he thought that so many challenges will face him from now on. With the help of the ones he trusts the most, they will discover what actually hides beneath the peace and prosperity of the new world, they will find the shadow that lurks beneath them. As the people around him discover and accept the truth of their own world will they also accept Alex's mysterious past? I'm only a beginner at writing and english is not my first language so please be considerate of my spelling and grammar errors. I have many ideas flowing in my head so please be patient while the plot slowly builds itself. I will give you more info on this novel later. Disclaimer: I do not own the cover! All credits to the creator of the cover! Any Pictures I put in the chapters do not belong to me!

Starving For Help by Lauryn_Love

"I smile everyday. I live my life like nothing is wrong with me. No one would ever guess that I'm screaming inside or that I've secretly been hiding this huge part of my life. No one would ever know that I cry myself to sleep at night or that deep down I'm starving for help." Welcome to Anorexia. Your hostess is Ana. She'll take over from here. Suffering alone inside of your mind from a terrifying mental disorder, is something that even those who battle such a thing every day, cannot fully understand. It's like being alone 24/7 yet it's never quiet inside of your head. You can't stop the voices. You can't control your emotions. As it gets worse, you lose control of your body all together. You become prey to your disease and You can't fight back. That is what it's like for someone who has spent years of their life suffering in silence from an eating disorder. Fighting a monster that you have no chance of beating. It's almost impossible to describe the type of torture that consumes your mind. Hell. It's equivalent to pure hell.

Again by CandyPlatypus

***Discontinued*** -Grace- Everything was great.. I had the best friends that anyone could ask for, and one that knew me better than I knew myself. We were in love... or so I thought. He took my heart with him to California and I was left a broken girl... how do you fix something that is permanently broken? How do you move on? You don't.. You have to live with it, and you have to be strong. Life goes on, even if you can't. -Jack- I kick myself... everyday. Why did I leave her? The fame... that fortune is nothing without her. I need her but I figured that out too late. She hates me, and I love her. How do you fix a heart that you let down? I had no idea but I was going to try and I was going to try damn hard. I had to fix her, and I had to make her love me again... I needed too. -Spencer- What do you do when all you knew and all that you gave everything to suddenly vanish? Do you sit and cry about it or do you get up and make something out of yourself from the pain? It's okay to feel pain, everyone does, but you gotta stand up and dust off the hurt and keep walking. That's exactly what I did, I moved on. I took my experiences and along with my best friend we wrote and made something of ourselves. But of course when all is well, life throws an unexpected curveball and tries to break you again. This is how I handled it. -Alex- I never meant to do the things I did, we all have those times when we're young and think what we're doing is the best choice. But what I did turned my life around in a matter of minutes. I never thought my choices would come back to bite me in the ass and when it did, it broke my every being. But I'm determined to fix what I broke, even if it means throwing away my pride and making myself look like a complete fool. I'll make it right this time.

Falling Apart by 1_Will_3

*TRIGGER WARNING: DEALS WITH DEPRESSION, SELF HARM AND SUICIDE* Amber is sixteen years old and to sugarcoat it... She hasn't had the best upbringing. She would love a different life, one where she can see her mother again and not be stuck with her abusive father. A life where she doesn't get taunted and hit and torn apart by everyone who she has ever seen. But she would never swap, she doesn't want anyone to endure the pain she's gone through. So instead, she tries to get rid of it... Again. But much to her disbelief, she is saved by the people she would least expect. She learns secrets about them that no one else knows. She feels included. Cared for. And dare I say it... She felt loved. For once in her life, she felt truly happy to be alive. But just when Amber felt safe, her life was flipped upside down and her past came back to haunt her just when she least expected it... (Sorry, I suck at descriptions, don't let it put you off) Ranking: #64 in Awareness #15 in Mental Health Awareness #73 in saddness

One Million Branches [Vic Fuentes Book One] by fidjdhhd

Paige, a girl from a broken home, her sister killed herself a few years ago and since then she has been depressed and guilty. She does all sorts of self harm and is suicidal. Her parents blame her for her sister's death, they beat her, make fun of her, and make her feel terrible about everything she does. Paige's only friends left her when she became depressed, leaving her with one friend who eventually stabbed her in the back and told everyone, everything. To escape everything Paige goes to the park and climbs trees, one day she starts talking to a class mate named Vic and they become friends, they tell each other everything. Will there friendship lead to something more? Or will Paige be left heartbroken? (TRIGGER WARNING) Sequel: It was all for you, all for you and more

We All Fall Down. (Jack Barakat of All Time Low) by StoryOfALonelyJane

I wrote this a long time ago, when I was 14/15, a time when self harm was something that seemed to just be everywhere in my life. I apologise to anyone who read this before I put this notice here, but I'm pretty sure in every chapter there is some sort of mention of mental illness/self harm. I know I could just take the story down, but it was one of the first ever stories I wrote that I liked and completed, and although I admit now it's not great, it shows progress. And progress is everything. Baby steps. Sorry again. This is an official TRIGGER WARNING. Emma is depressed. She's just been dumped and is being bullied. Can Jack save her or will she break his heart? I own everything in this story apart from lyrics used and bands mentioned, the storyline is my own and I'd appreciate it if you didn't take it or any element of my writing.

Not the Only One by IcyLeopard

"I'm not perfect. If you know my life story it would change your mind," I admit, looking down. Yes, I hate my past and yes, I'm most definitely not perfect. I untangle myself from Dante and get off the bed, turning to look at them all. "I need to go back to my hotel room to change." The response is instantaneous. All men frown and begin to protest. "You're staying here, sweetheart-" "Don't do this, love-" "Babygirl, stay with us-" I'm sure they don't all love me that much. It's probably a short-term love, temporary. I'm certain in a few months time they won't love me or want me to stay with them. "I'd love to stay but-" I begin to say before they all interrupt me. "Then that's final-" "You can stay-" "Please stay-" "I don't have clothes here," I state the obvious. "Wear ours!" they all exclaim at once. * * * * * * * Lexi has moved countries to escape her past and start a new life. She wants to make her own decisions and live her own life without people judging her. A charming man meets her and helps her get settled. She meets two other charming young men who help her. Each man helps her in different ways, yet she is attracted to them all the same. As she struggles with her mental health and tries not to drown into the depths of depression, it seems as though her past is too strong and she will never get better. No one can help her. Will Lexi succumb to depression, or will not only one, but three men, help her live the life she has spent so long looking for? WARNING!!! Contains scenes including suicide attempts, depression, brutal rape, extreme verbal and physical abuse, mature scenes, self harm (and things I may have forgotten) - It may be triggering to some people - If this is you, please don't read if it might trigger you I'm always here if anyone needs to talk

A Match to Water by shiningpolaris

Laying on the ground I couldn’t tell if I was alive or on the verge of death. I felt alive, but I was in a corpses body. But of course, if I was dead who would really care? Parents? My ‘friends’? My relatives, oh I don’t even want to think about that.. No one would really care..at least that is what I thought. Looking over at my wrists I see the familiar red color coming out, but it was worse. Much worse. Feeling my eyes start to close of fatigue I let them fall, I’m tired...all I need is a little..rest. The loud slamming of a door comes to my ears but I pay no attention, it was probably just the wind or my dad coming home not knowing his own strength and breaking the door. But that wasn’t on my mind right now. Rest. Thats all I need. A break. A time out. A chance to get away. Just a little time. One thing that came to my mind was that song. That song. I was absolute in love with that song, though I never really knew why. It was just that feeling inside that, made you feel connected. Yes. That song. Pierce the Veil, oh his voice is beautiful.. Just can calm me and make me fall asleep. On the verge of life or death I feel like, I’m floating. Something is holding me. Either the arms of angels or demons I don’t know. Just I was floating. The grip around me gets tighter, it wasn’t flames or clouds that I was getting lowered into. It was softer than clouds. It was one of the best places. I obviously have been here at least once, or I wasn’t at all. Maybe in one of my dreams. In a daydream. I wasn’t sure. But whatever or whoever this was made me feel comfortable, something that I haven’t been able to have. I hear this low voice above right above me, it was sad, full of regret, and most of all wanting. Begging. Pleading. Screaming. Crying. “Wake up! I know you can hear me!”

You may also like

Slide 1 of 9

Just A Thought cover

The Edge of Tomorrow cover

Starving For Help cover

Falling Apart cover

One Million Branches [Vic Fuentes Book One] cover

We All Fall Down. (Jack Barakat of All Time Low) cover

Not the Only One cover

A Match to Water cover

Just A Thought

Something tragic has happened. A 17 year old Valeri has to move to her dad's place. She spent all her life thinking he was dead. Her now dead mother told her that. Not knowing she has a twin brother she flies over the country and meets him there. She comes back into lives of people she once knew and loved. Not just her family. But someone else. A boy who took care of her when she was struggling. Her best friend. Valeri is dealing with addictions and when something at her new home happens, she sinks even lower. It might not end well for her. But she has friends now. Her kind brother, two funny friends and someone else she once knew... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Heyy! This is my first book. 1. I want to make it clear that English is not my first language and there might be writing mistakes. 2. ⚠️BEFORE YOU START READING CHECK TWs BELOW⚠️ 3. I myself struggle with an addiction and I think writing this book will help me process everything. That's another reason why I'm doing it. 4. You're welcome to comment but leave if you're here to write hate comments. I don't care what you think. 5. If you're here just for smut this is not a book for you. There might be some scenes but not many. This story is about struggling, dealing and fighting with addictions. 6. I'll post a new chapter every few days. I have a lot of schoolwork but I'll try my best. ⚠️TRIGGER WARNINGS: panic and anxiety attacks, self harm, sexual assault and rape, eating disorder, drinking and smoking, weed, pills, drug addiction, overdose, suicide attempt, depression, ptsd, swearing, mature content TROPES: -childhood best friend -friends to lovers -brother's best friend -who did this to you? -one bed trope I'LL PROBABLY ADD SOME MORE I hope you'll enjoy it!