Playing With Fire

How do you move on? How do you know that you've already moved on? That you already forgot her? The pain? The longing? And how do you tell your freaking heart to stop loving that "someone? How?

Gusto ko na ng mag move-on. Gusto kong makalimutan na siya ng tuluyan. Gusto kong huwag na siyang mahalin. Gusto kong kalimutan 'yung mga alaala na ginawa namin. At 'yung mga alaalang ginawa niya para sakin. I want to forget it so badly. Pero hindi ko magawa. Hindi ko kaya.

When she left I was heartbroken. I was at the edge of crying but the tears didn't spill. She's not worth it. And she will never be. Thinking that it was true love disgusts me. Because if she truly did move me she wouldn't have left me. She wouldn't have hurt me. Break me. And love me. Dahil kung ganito lang din naman ang gagawin niya ay mas mabuti pa ang wala.

Pain turned into anger. I was mad at what she did! Furious even! So I improvised a plan. I will wait for her to come back. Call it being arrogant but I'm pretty sure she will come back looking for me. I'm confident na mahal niya parin ako. When she found me, she begged on her knees. She begged for me to come back to her. To make me hers again. To make me her toy again. But too bad, I have better plans. I gave her an option.

I want her to be my slave. I want her to follow everything I will say. I want her to be my everything. She quickly agreed. Still persistent to make me come back to her. But I was still furious for what she did.

I want to make my revenge. I want her to suffer the hell I've been through. I want her to realize that you can't have anything and everything you want. I want to see her cry on her knees. I want her to regret what she did. I want her to feel everything I felt.

But little did I know, I'm playing with fire. And at the end I got burned. Aggressively and utterly burnt.