Our Pact
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WpMetadataNoticeÚltima atualização ter, jan 29, 2019
Sadness is all I know. I wish it was a cliche fairy tale where she would come back and we could pretend the past years never happened. Where we could live "happily every after". Bull. I understand that she was taken away from me, I understand that I'll never see her again, I understand that things were just going to be great again. What I just don't understand... is why it had to happen to me. Why it had to happen to her. Why people who want to be reckless exist, who don't think of how they can affect others. I just... I can't seem to understand. Therapy. No help. Talking. Nope. The only solution is to get her back. But, as I said, we live in the real world where you're punished for loving someone. I'll never see her lit up eyes and glowing smile. Or her messy bun that she pouted over. All I have, is her words, stuck to my heart, bringing me down every day, because I can't seem to escape what she did to me. She made me love her. Made me chase her. Chase her up to where I couldn't have her. I assure you, you'll cry. So, go ahead put on some Billie Eilish, and bawl your eyes out. It's an invitation. You may need to have tissues, you may need to buy an extra copy of this book from the tears you drop on it. But go ahead and open it. And be prepared. Because what you'll feel, I felt 100 times worse.
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I lost my mom at 11, that's when it started. My dad became a drunk and I was left to take care of my 3-month-old baby sister. Now I'm 23, graduated a few years ago and my sister, now 12, can understand what happened. She never fully understood when I needed someone to and I didn't have many friends that stuck around afterwards. Until I met him. We were friends first, then the feelings got deeper. He asked me to be his girlfriend. He was my first kiss, first date, first real friend, first love, everything. I loved him and I do. I've said it. Now all we do is fight. I don't know why we can't figure things out, but I can't take this fighting. I just want things to go back to the way things were. The way we used to be... Happy, carefree teens that pretended we had the whole world figured out.

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