She is too good for someone like me
  • Reads 3,233
  • Votes 142
  • Parts 30
  • Time 2h 26m
  • Reads 3,233
  • Votes 142
  • Parts 30
  • Time 2h 26m
Ongoing, First published Feb 07, 2019
Mature
I see her everywhere I go. I saw her at the lake, I saw her having a water fight with some guy, I saw her at the restaurant, and now I see her walk or drive to the nursing home across the street from my club the Wild Rose MC. I see her in her during uniform. My grandfather is placed there but I have never seen her work there before. Maybe she doesn't work the weekends my brother and I visit with our grandfather.  She is a tiny thing who appears to be sad all the time. I have not seen her smile often when I have seen her but I am drawn to her. She is too good for someone like me.  I was working on a brothers bike when she pulled up and saw several girls run to her car. They pulled her car door open and my brother and I heard one girl say. You have to get in her now. Richard called and threatened to hurt you. Then an older woman said. Tonight two of my boys will come here and walk all you girls to the cars.  I don't know why he doesn't leave me alone I heard the girl that I call my princess  say.  My brother looked at me and said. Someone is threatening her. We can't let that happen. She is under our protection whether you like it or not he said. Let's visit grandpa tonight he said. Ok, I said. My road name is Wild Wolf. I am like a wolf when I get pissed off. I have anger issues. I wonder if this is the new girl granddad wants us to meet?
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This is my truth

72 parts Ongoing

My life has been an intense journey from a little girl who was beaten down and abused into believing that she was worthless, to a woman at 43 years of age who is still desperately searching for who she truly is. I found her though. I did. And she writes like me, from inside of me. She is me. This girl that I've been in love with since time first existed, is indeed me. The way that she walks. With her hands... and how she talks? The hearts that she's captured, the souls that she has inspired. I'm now trying to be her. I've never felt that I was good enough to actually be myself!!! I always knew how pure and clear and free I was inside. But people told me otherwise, in a very cruel way. No one ever spared my feelings or thought to speak to me with kindness or love. My parents were very serious and strict people. They believed that there was only 1 way to act and inside I knew that I did NOT fit in the parameters of the behavior expected of me. And every single time I made my Step Daddy sigh or frown it felt like I knife in my heart. I was a let down. Always too loud. Always moving too much. Always too fat and always too ugly. Always too much. Unless I sat quietly. But I've always been a firecracker and all of that containment really made me want to blow off! All of what was inside of me, swirling and dividing in me. Burying the side of me that I loved the most! I was a bastard and a blasphemy. Harsh words for a girl of 3. They said them when they baptized me.