Where Betrayal Meet Deception

One minute you're trying make me your girl.Then when I give you a chance to be my man you wife me.Then you was inside my heart, my body making babies.Then out nowhere my happiness is scattered. Now you're out all night, out of money, out of emotions. "Then boom," you're saying baby "I need you, my words are saying "HELL NAWL"!!! But my heart's lonely without you. Then im thinking to myself, 16years, 3 sons, a house, 2 cars, is it worth it? Then I question you, how, why, where did we go wrong? You would respond so bold and cold, "THAT'S THE PAST" I'M HERE WITH YOU AND THE BOYS. SHE MEANT NOTHING TO ME!!!! Tears flowing like a river, mixed emotions, but I love him.. But the reality he has a set of twins girls with our neighbor .Even though we moved away from the neighborhood, child support reminds me weekly out his check. My hurt, my anger, won't let me move past it, even though the twins are 2. I see them in our home weekly because he has visitation rights. How much of his disloyalty do I have to be reminded of. He feels more like a roommate than my husband.I know the pain hasn't left even though we went to marriage counseling. I went from weighing 160 to 130 in less than 2 months .When others ask Jennifer have you've lost weight, my response would be "Girl, you know I'm a vegan. But when no one's around i can't keep food down. Everytime I think about how he lied about the rumors of sleeping with the neighbors,
until he had a court appearance for paternity. I can't seem to move past that. day.Do i stay?,Do i cheat to make myself feel better? Do i continue to pray for my heart to be heal.Then i get a phone call Jennifer Is Mike home we need him Cassie and the girls was in a car accident.I yelled to Mike and told him immediately he race to the hospital.Now im sitting here looking out the window waiting for him to return.Im calling his phone to see if everything ok.No answer going straight to voicemail.Im pacing the floor wondering what's going, about go insane .