my meth story

40, HIV+, White, Has used Crystal
From the time I was a young boy, religion was a very important part of my life. My father died when I was nine and I had absolutely no doubt that he had gone to heaven and took comfort in the fact that I would see him again. Around this time, I began having feelings for other boys.

I recall our parish priest preach that he could understand aid for homeless people, but aid for people with AIDS was taking things too far. He was basically saying that they were getting what they deserved and no one should try to help them.

When I was 19, I began to drink and drug to bury my feelings and prayed that God would me make straight. I gained a lot of weight and struggled for many years with a food addiction. For years afterwards, I had sex with men but could not stay in a relationship because I did not believe I was worthy of being loved. I had anonymous sex just to feel good, but I was so ashamed of my behavior that I compartmentalized my life. Guilt and sham