Why My Thighs Touch

So my therapist, Dr. Gina, asked me to list two things I like about my body and two I don’t. My list went something like this:

Like:

1) Big boobs. (Does this count?)
2) Curvy. (I’m more squiggly, but what the hell.)

Don’t like:

1) Flabby abs.
2) Thunder thighs, arms and neck.

After looking at the list, Dr. Gina told me that I had low self-esteem and that I obviously knew what my problem was, so why didn’t I try to lose weight?

I never went back. The only thing I lost in that session was my temper, goddamn skinny therapist.