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thoughts
ilikeindiebands
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ilikeindiebands
Ongoing, First published May 14, 2019
Mature
dailyemotionsfeelingsftmhighschooljournallgbtlgbtqnotesteenteenagerthoughtsthoughtsandfeelingstranstransgender
just random ramblings and things I think of. no real story here. just the raw feelings. 

a bit about me:

trans guy. 17. can't see shit. senior. anxious. trying to kick depression in the ass. trying to find the people I love. trying to be me in a world that's terrifying and beautiful
All Rights Reserved
dailyemotionsfeelingsftmhighschooljournallgbtlgbtqnotesteenteenagerthoughtsthoughtsandfeelingstranstransgender
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17 parts

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Book I: to cross oceans for [BxB] (trans) - completed by transFigure_
46 parts Complete Mature
"What if I'm not one?" I asked, my body wound tight with tension. "One what?" he asked, his voice soft and low. I hesitated. Was I ready? I wanted to tell him so badly. Wanted to scream it from the fucking rooftops. But there would be no going back if I allowed the words to spill out into the world. Telling myself I didn't need someone else's validation, that I knew myself well enough to know with absolute certainty that I was trans was all good and well in principle. But lying here underneath my bed, with my best friend's body pressed so close to mine I could feel his warm breath on my face, I felt those convictions slip through my fingers. Danny's rejection would break me. In a fundamental way. "One what?" he repeated the question, scooting so close to me the tip of his nose brushed mine. Dust motes danced around us, suspended in mid air, teetering on the brink of this momentous feeling wrapping itself around us. I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing down the rush of anxiety trying to drown me. His nose bumped mine again and his breath ghosted over my lips. I opened my eyes and stared unblinkingly into his. 'A girl', I wanted to say, even though I knew the words would taste sour in my mouth, 'what if I'm not a girl?' -------------------------------------- Sean and Danny have been next door neighbours and best friends since they were six years old. They've shared almost everything. From first kisses and crushes to heartbreak. But Sean has a secret. One he's never shared with his best friend - who's also the guy he's been in love with since he's known what love is. Sean is trans and struggling to come out. But it's Senior year and choices have to be made. Between college applications, uncovering a plan to hurt one of their classmates and his relationship with Danny, Sean is struggling with doing the right thing and graduating high school in one piece. ⭐to cross oceans for is PART I of Sean and Danny's story⭐ *TW: sexual assault and bullying *
The Adventures of A Teenage Boy by BabySuga7
51 parts Complete Mature
Ever felt like you don't belong? I do most of the time. I watch my friends smiles and try to match and try to be happy but I can't stop feeling like something's missing. They all out here having good things going for them while I'm boring as hell. I don't know what I'm missing but I can't help it. ...
𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆, 𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐁𝐋 by Rafayelsstarfish
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"I don't want you guys to leave again." "We're not." ~~~~~~ * ~~~~~~ The three of them, once separate years ago, now are reunited in college. Things are different this time, but what isn't different are their feelings from each other. They are now roommates, but Damien and Caleb are in long term relationships, and Milo refuses to like them again because of the heartbreaking he went through. As time goes on, their feelings bubble back up for each other and those long term relationships are broken off for a new yet old relationship to form again. But was breaking off those long term relationships good for an old short term relationships they previously had at camp many years ago? _________ 𝕊𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕥𝕖𝕕 (07/28/24) 𝔼𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕕 (11/15/24)
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Ages 14+ (lesbian concepts and some profanity) This is not your everyday love story, okay? It's not a chick flick either. The events and themes within my pages have meaning, depth, truth-and most of all, reality. You are about to be taken on an adventure about a girl who's life is not like everybody else's. I look like a normal teen girl, I mean, I have hair and two eyes and two hands and feet like everybody else, but I couldn't feel more different. I have two moms, yes. Let's just get that out there before you start reading and close my diary like everyone in my life has shut me out of theirs. All I want is a normal life with normal friends who don't judge me because of my home situation. I don't even remember the last time I went on a sleepover or called somebody my age. I don't mean to be a downer, because it does get better. Life gets better. Struggles are only temporary, I know that now. And by my last words reach your eyes, I've come a long way, and have grown to see potential in myself. I'm sharing this with you because I want to make a difference. I know now that I'm not the only one in the world that feels alone. I've been there, done that, and there's more loneliness to come, but for now, I feel more prepared for it. I know how it feels to sit by yourself at lunch every day and how it feels to watch others go to prom with dates and feel like shit because you don't think you'd even have any friends to go with. Please ready my diary. I am much older now, and much more wiser, and I can't wait for you to realize the potential in yourself, too.
Just Okay by kittenite_
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We've all been through ups and downs in life and not all of us can speak our minds. I'm not the kind of person that can just talk to anyone about my thoughts and problems. No I can't talk to anyone because no one knows what's going on in my life. I've tried talking to people but it just seems impossible for them to understand. My life isn't completely shit, but it's close. It's not the people in my life, it's not the things they do, it's just me and my mind.
Twisted by __sillage__
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"I think I'm gay." I say, leaving out the part about my... exposing dream about him last night. I watched his expression, waiting for some sign that he was angry. I waited for him to call me a faggot, to curse me off and tell me he never wanted to see me again. Instead, I was greeted with his perfect toothy smile. "That's great man, I'm of proud you." He says, patting my arm as he stuffed another cracker in his mouth. "It takes some real balls to come out to someone." He says, his beautiful green eyes blazing into mine. I felt myself become flustered at his gaze. "Uh, Yeah, Thanks." I stumbled out, "You're not mad?" I ask. His expression turns to hurt as he crinkles his eyebrows. "Why the hell would I be mad?" He asks, hesitating on the crackers and pushing them away. "I just thought-it's just- well... you just always seem so pissed when someone mentions the word gay." I spit out words, scared for his reaction. He sighs, "That doesn't fucking mean I hate gays. Normally when I do that it's because someone's using the word 'gay' to hate on them, it just pisses me off, you know?" He asks, bringing the crackers back into his lap and biting into them. "Plus-" He adds on, "You're my best friend, if anything, you being gay is a blessing. I'll always support you." He says, glancing at me through the side of his eyes. I look away, towards the door to hide the crimson blush that I feel spread over my face. "Thanks." I all but squeak out. And that's the day I realized, I have a faint crush on my best friend. &lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&lt; THIS BOOK IS BEING *MAJORLY* EDITED. THERES LOTS OF SPELLING MISTAKES AND NAME MIX UPS, SOME CHAPTERS WILL BE REWRITTEN Also, Please don't be mean to the characters, they aren't even close to perfect, but they don't deserve hate.
Sophomore Year Journal by SaraSempiternal
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Not a princess I wanna be a prince. (The story of a transgendered person) by nightheart97
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"that's rich coming from a pretty boy" I narrow my eyes. "I'm not a pretty boy." He smirks standing from the desk and reaching forward twirling a piece of my hair between his fingers. "not in the traditional sense no...but you still bleed daddy's money" I reach up gripping his wrist, maybe harder then necessary; suddenly angry. "you don't know me Jasper, don't pretend you do" He sucks in a breath before leaning forward and putting his mouth next to my ear "I know you're so desperate for me, you can't fucking think straight" My breath catches and my eyes flick up meeting his not believing I heard what I did, but there's no denying it when he pushes me against his door and his lips meet my own hungry, angry, frustrated. ••• Jasper Collins is not expecting to ever step foot inside Balton's Boys School. A private behavioural school for those who can afford it, but after one too many expulsions and a scholarship opportunity Jasper finds himself stuck in a place filled with pretty boys who've done nothing worse then forget to shine their silver spoon. Beckett Chambers took on a mentorship position at Balton's to stay away from home. He could care less about status and social image he just wants to find a way out of Manning Heights and Balton's was supposed to be his safe haven until then. What he didn't expect was for his mentee to show up and make everything a whole lot more complicated. ________________________________________ Disclaimers: •This is a bXb story! •This is a LIGHTLY edited, first draft *respectful* constructive criticism is welcome🤍 Cover art: Created on Canva, unfortunately I don't know the artist who created the artwork :( Started: December 2020 Completed: December 2022 •• #1 in QueerLove -04/05/22 #1 in boysschool -05/15/22 #2 in MxM -05/05/22 #2 in Confused -05/19/22 #1 in Poorboy -09/08/22 #1 in Queer -05/08/22 #1 in Mentor -07/5/22 #1 in bxblove -09/01/22 #1 in boardingschool-12/16/22 #1 in delinquent
Mr. Match (BoyxBoy) ✓ by euwangabrielll
27 parts Complete
I'm Finn Vasco but that's not quite important right now. I'm a pretty sarcastic guy if I'm gonna be honest. I'm closed off and I literally only have one friend. I might hate everybody in my school... but there's this guy there. He's... let's say, dreamy, someone who I thought would never even acknowledge my existence. That guy who was too damn good to be true, who was too good for me, who was too good for... everybody! You get what I'm trying to say. He's that cliché king of the campus and a popular and attractive heartthrob and with just one wink, he can send people on their knees... That sounded so wrong, anyway. So can you blame me for being over the moon when one day, he approached me only to what? ...To ask for my help courting my freaking best friend. I knew it was stupid for me to hope I'd even have any chance with him anyway. So I just agreed to help him. Even if I was hurting myself and potentially my best friend in the process, my best friend who has been there with me through the thick and thins, I still did it... I mean what could go wrong besides literally everything? So my plan was to just set my crush and my best friend up, and then everything would be alright... right? But of course, life doesn't like it when people have it easy. *** Highest Ranking #2 on #lgbtfiction #5 on #boyxboy #6 on #gay #8 on #teenfiction *** ~ WARNING: This story contains strong language and bullying. If you're not a fan of LGBTQ+ stories or BXB stories, then this story is not for you. ~ If you're gonna plagiarize, you might as well just put your clown outfit on.
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Slide 1 of 10
Book I: to cross oceans for [BxB] (trans) - completed cover
The Adventures of A Teenage Boy cover
𝐑𝐨��𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆, 𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐁𝐋 cover
Catastrophically Carla (Lesbian Story) cover
Just Okay cover
Twisted cover
Sophomore Year Journal cover
Not a princess I wanna be a prince. (The story of a transgendered person) cover
A Boy From Manning Heights ✔️ cover
Mr. Match (BoyxBoy) ✓ cover

Book I: to cross oceans for [BxB] (trans) - completed

46 parts Complete Mature

"What if I'm not one?" I asked, my body wound tight with tension. "One what?" he asked, his voice soft and low. I hesitated. Was I ready? I wanted to tell him so badly. Wanted to scream it from the fucking rooftops. But there would be no going back if I allowed the words to spill out into the world. Telling myself I didn't need someone else's validation, that I knew myself well enough to know with absolute certainty that I was trans was all good and well in principle. But lying here underneath my bed, with my best friend's body pressed so close to mine I could feel his warm breath on my face, I felt those convictions slip through my fingers. Danny's rejection would break me. In a fundamental way. "One what?" he repeated the question, scooting so close to me the tip of his nose brushed mine. Dust motes danced around us, suspended in mid air, teetering on the brink of this momentous feeling wrapping itself around us. I squeezed my eyes shut, pushing down the rush of anxiety trying to drown me. His nose bumped mine again and his breath ghosted over my lips. I opened my eyes and stared unblinkingly into his. 'A girl', I wanted to say, even though I knew the words would taste sour in my mouth, 'what if I'm not a girl?' -------------------------------------- Sean and Danny have been next door neighbours and best friends since they were six years old. They've shared almost everything. From first kisses and crushes to heartbreak. But Sean has a secret. One he's never shared with his best friend - who's also the guy he's been in love with since he's known what love is. Sean is trans and struggling to come out. But it's Senior year and choices have to be made. Between college applications, uncovering a plan to hurt one of their classmates and his relationship with Danny, Sean is struggling with doing the right thing and graduating high school in one piece. ⭐to cross oceans for is PART I of Sean and Danny's story⭐ *TW: sexual assault and bullying *

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