Redemption

If love brings pain why do we love. loving, hating but we still end up breaking. The heart is fragile, why not put it in a cage, lock it up and throw away the key.

Loving you was like worshipping god but you did not worship me back, instead my love was treated as a sin and you enjoyed seeing me sin, because I could only ever sin for you.

This pain, will it end when you give me my heart back. I have return yours, why do you still hold mine.
I beg and beg but my pleading was ignore.
Do you love me?, I once ask but you only smiled, I taught it was a yes but why does it hurt so much. Why does loving you bring me so much pain, why wont you return it, this love is numbing.

What is love, what is pain. Why cant I tell the difference anymore. I think loves hates me and pain adore me, but it feels like this love of mine will eventually drive me mad, I think hating you will let me feel some sort of relief. I loved you with my all but it was painful, so hating you with my all will be the redemption I will give to myself, this painful feeling will eventually fade, just like my love it will fade and only hate will remain. Loving you was my sin and hating you will be my redemption.
....................Jane Edward