What’s the disease of addiction mean to you?
The inability to stop
jamming a needle into your veins
though you don’t have any good ones left?
What about sleeping in cardboard
boxes, park benches, in stairwells
because you needed the next one.
Fuck rent, light, food –
just use.
What was your hustle?
Sell drugs you didn’t even do?
Sell anything & everything –
TVs, food stamps, refrigerators, household products
Hell,
your body will do.
Finding yourself behind dumpsters,
alleyways, cars you didn’t even know
Or did you stroll on Craigs List Avenue?
starting with “strictly massages”.
But that’s not enough for the Beast within.
It needs you to hate yourself more.
Lower prices for higher (risks
of) bundles, rocks, bags,
that didn’t even get you high anymore.
It’s what makes you steal from your family
manipulate your mentally ill grandmother
into giving you money
what makes you lie to anyone you’ve
ever
cared about.
It goes much deeper than that.
Not a moral deficiency
but a sickness that ki