Depression

Depression

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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Fri, Dec 26, 2014
Sometimes I smile because I remember when I was happy. Then I cry because I don't have very many memories. And then I look down and I ask myself who would want a girl like me? A girl with a troubled past and wrists full of cuts and scares. A girl who doesn't know what a real smile or lauh is anymore and a girl like me. Depressed.
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"Nothing makes you hurt like hurting who you love" Love shouldn't hurt, loving somebody with everything you have shouldn't make you feel like you're dying. Louis feels like he's drowning. He should have known where this was going from the start, he should have been prepared. Now he's waking up in an empty bed, some days he doesn't want to even wake up again. There's a hole in his heart; it's in the shape of Harry. Nothing he does can fill it. Drugs, alcohol, pouring out his heart into songs that Harry probably won't ever hear. When Louis is with him, he feels like he's in heaven. Being alone, that's what he feels he deserves, at least Harry can be happier without him. Maybe if they met at a different time, under different circumstances, he could have saved them. Louis had to do what was best for Harry, but it kills him a little everyday. Louis sees his smile everyday, but he knows it's no longer for him. Someone else makes Harry happier, but Louis wanted it to be him. They could have had forever. Louis would have given Harry everything. "Forget what I said, it's not what I meant" Harry had tried to say, but Louis knew that wasn't the truth. After everything they've been through, Louis still loves him.

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