Times makers
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- Parts 1
La première fois qu'il m'a raconté son histoire, je n'y ai pas cru. Je n'y ai jamais cru.
La première fois que j'ai donné mon coeur à quelqu'un, ce n'était pas réciproque. Je n'étais pas Amanda Stewart.
La première fois que j'ai trop bu, j'avais dix-huit ans. C'était mon père qui était venu me chercher, je n'avais jamais eu aussi honte parait-il. La bétise de l'âge.
La première fois que j'ai dû parler de toi au passé, je n'ai jamais eu aussi mal. J'aurais dû croire à tes fantaisies au lieu de te contredire. "Tu y croiras un jour" tu me disais.
La première fois que la mort a posé ses lèvres sur moi, je n'ai pas aimé ça, alors je suis revenu.
Alors pourquoi ce corps n'est-il pas le mien ?
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It's moments like these that make me feel like my soul is entangled with his. It feels like all of the broken pieces of me turned out to be the missing pieces in his puzzle and not at all the worthless trash that I thought they were previously. Every jagged edge dripping with blood that killed the child in me has a home against one of his, which have slowly healed into each other. Huh. Maybe that's just it. Maybe our pasts were meant to be so painful and broken so that when we met, we'd fit each other so perfectly, so snuggly, so completely that nothing would ever be able to break us again. Maybe all of the pain and suffering and loneliness truly did have a purpose after all. Maybe all of it was so that I could become the kind of person that I needed when I was a kid. - - - She is the most selfless, giving, caring, compassionate, intelligent, fearless, ambitious, loyal, kind, stubborn, patient, hardworking, did I mention stubborn-as-hell, woman I have ever met. She treats the world with such kindness even though it has beaten her till she was bloody and bruised more times than you can count. No one in this world deserves happiness and peace more than she does. I just want to grab her demons by the fucking throat and hurt them as bad as they hurt her. I want to hurt Bohr and her dad and Caroline and every person that ever made her feel small or insignificant or made her hate herself. I just want to help her feel happy. She's drowning in front of me and I'm just trying to pull her out of the water.
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