Bloom on Midnight
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Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Tue, Jul 23, 2019
I wrote and create this back 2018. It was depressing for me when i was stuck with my exboyfriend
It was tiring, violently mentally. I wish things can be different back then but for a moment, im thanking myself for letting myself out from that relationship.
Its not ok to be hard on yourself cause being vulnerable back then was totally ' lame'. Was that a good choice of word? Idk. I never good in words that why manipulative is the domain in my past. U will understand
U will know.
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#114
daylight
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This is a collection of my writing from the past 7 years. Before I started to write, I was a very lost individual, as are most teens, but I was lost in darkness. I was too afraid to move anywhere at all. I hid in the dark, debilitated by my own anxiety, sadnesses, anger, and hopelessness. I was desperate to be loved and feared it the most, I was a coward, I was self-destructive, I would mentally bend my thoughts to the point of bordering insanity. I was born into this world alone, and got too comfortable with it. Maybe I still am, but a fraction of what I used to be. This writing is extremely vulnerable, and potentially disturbing to others, as all my weaknesses, strengths, obsessions with making every moment sentimental, the sickening desperation I've had, the destructiveness, and the constant brutal reconstruction of my mind. Without guidance, it's been absolute intense chaos. Though, there is beauty in the darkness. Everything can be found in the darkness. You'll find that through my writing, I've somehow slowly become exactly what I've written. A living representation of my writing and what I wanted to be. Without myself even knowing it. A lot of my writing themes are based around nature, or some kind of natural aspect. The imagery I paint with natural metaphors is constant, the animals, just like you and I, the plants, and all other living things. I planted these seeds in my mind, unknowingly at the time, where I now feel the deep dark green jungle pressing at the inner walls of my skull. It's all that I want to consume my mind. There's so much to learn. The magic of nature, and it's infinite wisdom. It's as if I have been on this path all along, and I didn't even know what I was doing, yet my body and mind were passively taking care of me. Giving me and eventually showing exactly what I want, and wanted to become. I have every moment, every instance of suffering, and every epiphany to be thankful for. Soon, I'll be at peace from the raging storm.Complete
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||Will-O'-The-Wisp || 💫#FreeMentalIllness ||Wattys 2020||
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Thoughts at midnight. Love. Heartbreak. Loneliness. Encouragement.
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