How to die laughing
- LECTURAS 556
- Votos 127
- Partes 18
Continúa43m
Última publicación dom, abr 12, 2020
Hi, I'm Fitz Johansen, you've probably heard about me, I'm one of the class comedians, the guy who stands up to bullies, the guy who plays pranks on teachers, nasty pranks. Anyway, my best buds and I find this weird spellbook with dry jokes in it, pretty weird, but it gets even weirder the jokes are killers, literally. They make you laugh like crazy then your skin becomes dry and then you age like crazy till your nothing but a dry bag of bones. We try to hide it but it keeps coming back and there's this weird clown that wants it, he'll kill for it, even us.
Todos los derechos reservados
#108
clowns
Únete a la comunidad narrativa más grandeObtén recomendaciones personalizadas de historias, guarda tus favoritas en tu biblioteca, y comenta y vota para hacer crecer tu comunidad.
Quizás también te guste
The Lilac Killer
"I've been waited my whole life to kill you, and you're telling me you can't die?" "Uh, yes?" "Are you freaking kidding me?!" "Uh, no." ------------ I'm so crappy at descriptions, I'm sorry 😬 Basically this is my first fanfic but, I've written other works before but, all those are original. I own all the characters but, Wilford Wafstache I guess 🤷🏾♀️ ----- There is some cussing but, it's bleeped out.Concluida
Revenge Of The Fat Wallflower|✓
(Editing) His eyes widen and his lips part in pain as he stares wordlessly at me and then at the large blotch that forms around his chest . He clutches it as he coughs in pain. I didn't get to push him into a sewer, but this feels so much better. I sardonically chuckle to myself before leaning in to whisper into his ear. "Gotcha." - - - I was a nobody . A big fat wallflower that was always in the background. The only mistake I made was confessing to the school's prince. That day I was completely and utterly humiliated. It's been two years and now I'm back. Back for some sweet revenge. #Winner of the Pre-Watty awards for best laugh worthy book. *Filled with humor and jokes that can't stop you from chuckling ;) # 1 ranking in Stop bullying (10/5/18) #11 In Humor (1/6/18) ©Nikithasuz123 Cover credits to unreadymage. Amazing cover XDConcluida
Sort of Deadly
*Sequel to 'Sort Of Dead'* *Kindly read the previous installment beforehand* ~ "You know the feeling when you see a glass jar filled with perfectly round, colorful marbles, and you just want to put one - or two, or three - in your mouth, even though you know it's dangerous and can kill you? Right. Hold that thought. We'll come back to it." _______________________________________ Not all dreams terminate when you wake up. Some last longer. And some can take over your reality. After the party's victorious return to {Undisclosed}, it takes them a while to coze up to their silly, mundane lives. The sail's smooth . . . at least until Bee starts having those awful nightmares. Those very REAL nightmares. The bookworm finds herself in such a fix - oh, boy, wait for this - that she can't think a way out of it. She's pretty certain she's going to die. It's her friends that she is more worried about. --Have fun! All of your favorite characters are back in this one, and then some! Laugh and sob and cheer them on! #completed { Awesome cover by @jaszthewayyoulikeit } Pst scrpt: I know this blurb sucks. ***All rights reserved: Do not recreate or plagiarise. This is an original work.***Concluida
Violet's Delight
"Well then. That's the first time a girl has ever rejected my close proximity," he said, eyes ablaze with a playful fire. "You better get used to it," I retorted as I spun on my heel and headed for the school doors that led to the outside. "I've never met anyone like you before," he called after me, this time, not coming after me. "I know, Romeo. I'm a special little snowflake," I called back, not turning around. "You got the 'little' part right there, Princess!" he shouted after me. I threw up my middle finger back to him and heard him laugh as I exited out the doors rather dramatically. ... I'm tired of all those high school stories about a straight-A girl student with the perfect life who falls for the stereotypical Mr. Bad Boy who wears leather black jackets and only has a soft spot for her. That's not how the real world works, sweetheart. I may look like a damsel, but I'm never in distress. ... Not me making fun of the "she's not like every other girl" trope <3 o.o :)) I like to think I'm funny. After all: #3 in amusement 10/22/22 #1 in banter 10/31/22 #3 in friendship 11/7/22Concluida
Finding Maze
" aww, how kind. Is this your way of getting another proof that I am a criminal so that you can put me in prison. Because, if that is the goal, you guys fucking suck at it " I snapped. In one swift moment, Alex grabbed me by my arm and gripped it" you will do as I say or else.. " "What? Or else what? Throw me in prison? Shatter my life. Let's get one thing straight here, I am lethal just as much as you guys are, I will fucking ruin your life for all the crimes that you have done. If I am going down, then each and every one of you are going down. You think I don't know anything about you all? You think your walls are made of stone that no one can enter? Well, news flash, Alex I know how you are a shallow person behind this rude persona of yours. I know the exact reason why Rowling broke up with you. Want me to reveal each and every one of your secrets and make your life miserable than it already is?... " Alex slowly removed his hand".. That's what I thought. Now shut up and fuck off" I said and took my hot chocolate and walked away.Concluida
I Checked Out the Badboy's Boxers
"Not the typical cliche teen fiction" "You're hooked from the get go. Pretty much similar to when you can't stop eating till the last slice of pizza, or have the eagerness to pee, but can't because you're scared that if you stop reading you'll miss the intensity each word brings." "There isn't even a word good enough to describe this book. I'm speechless." - "Please Lexa?" Elle looks at me, "Just fill in my spot for ten minutes." At that moment I was calm, what could go wrong with running a checkout isle for ten minutes? As it turns out, everything. -- "Why are you checking me out?" His voice questions. Even his voice is the sexiest thing I've ever heard. Not to mention the broad shoulder, killer jawlined boy it came from. "I wasn't, I swear!" My cheeks blush ferociously. How the hell did he notice? In fact I'd always thought I was pretty stealthy. He just chuckles and looks at me, a rambling mess, "Yes you are." "Okay, alright, you know what-" I pause trying to pick up the pieces of my shattered dignity from the floor, "Maybe you shouldn't come in here like a fracking ambercrombie model and then on top of that blame a poor little innocent girl for looking-" "I meant those. You're checking me out." He gestures to the items laying across the counter and the scanner in my hand. Oh shit. Let me just repeat that for a moment now. Oh shit. -- Started: 12/27/15 Ended: 10/24/18 February 2019: #1 HUMOR -- Warning: I cannot guarantee you will walk away from this book unaffectedConcluida
Cliché, Touché and Douche
{Completed - #12 highest} I was walking on a path all alone at midnight. I was just wondering around, until I saw a guy in a hoodie. He was beating the pulp out of another guy and one more man was on the ground, he was not moving. I gasped. 'Is he dead?' Or he can be unconscious, yeah 'el' he is just unconscious not dead. Duh! Who would kill a guy? As I was proceeding with my thoughts, that hoodie guy turned his face towards me. My heart had a mini heart attack. I turned my heels to the opposite direction and started to run. 'Run Ella, run for your life' was what my mind was screaming to me. I took turns without thinking, that guy was now following me and guess what? I took a wrong turn and which ended up being a dead end ' You are so dead' I thought. So, I started to think what I said last time to the people I love. 'Good night mom, love you.' to my mom, 'Stop annoying me! I'm going to bed.' to dad which also mean I love you, 'See you later Lu, love you!' to Luana. Okay my good bye says I love them all. Now I can die in peace. Granddad I'll meet you soon in the heaven, if you are there. I was still in my deep thoughts until I saw his silhouette. As, he get closer, my heart begin to race faster. I closed my eyes, until I heard him say "Ella?" O to the M to the G, this person actually knows me. I opened my one eye and saw him due to the small light hanging in that ally "Errrrr'ick!" I squeaked and mentally face palmed myself. Even at this state I'm calling him Errr'ick. "I'm sorry your highness, what can I do for you?" I squeaked again while trembling. The next second I heard his fits of laughter. He was rolling on the floor, actually rofling. I was glaring at him but I realised that I'm not in a position to glare. So, I made puppy dog face for him to spare my little life. He stopped but after seeing my face, he started to laugh again. He tried to say between his guffaws "You..... your face .....was epiccc!" He started to gasp for air and had tears in his eyes.Concluida
My Baby Sister ✔️wattys2018 Completed
so this is my story my brothers are very protective i was 15 they treated me like a 6 year old maybe even like a 2 year old first im use to it when im 15 and I'm getting I tired of it turn 16 I have like 9 brothers and me and my on sister (So for grammar mistakes the book makes me cringe bye)Concluida
The Gory Details (Gross)
Between 2004 and 2008 I wrote a series of "Tips for Writers" for Nocturnal Ooze magazine vaguely about what would happen in real life if you did the things they do in movies but mostly about the gross out. I've always loved them and so have taken them out of mothballs for a new audience here on wattpad. They're all here except for #13 which seems to have vanished. I've also left them mostly intact except for a few very dated references that have been updated. I own the rights to the articles and Queen Mum of the Ooze, Kay Patterson has allowed me to keep the name "Gore Monger" (which she owns) provided I write: The Gore Monger appears courtesy of Nocturnal Ooze. If you enjoy these articles, please consider supporting me on Patreon. https://www.patreon.com/NogginBrain?fan_landing=trueConcluida
High School Rants
High school is a rough place, so I figured that to help myself cope, I'd write all my troubles down. WARNING, BOOK MAY CONTAIN -Swearing -Lots of sarcasm -Awkward moments -and lots of ranting *COMPLETE*Concluida
"I've been waited my whole life to kill you, and you're telling me you can't die?" "Uh, yes?" "Are you freaking kidding me?!" "Uh, no." ------------ I'm so crappy at descriptions, I'm sorry 😬 Basically this is my first fanfic but, I've written other works before but, all those are original. I own all the characters but, Wilford Wafstache I guess 🤷🏾♀️ ----- There is some cussing but, it's bleeped out.
Más detallesPautas de Contenido