I'm Not the Chosen One, Stop Looking at Me Like That
17 parts Ongoing Nothing is more PEACEFUL than a village of rampaging teens, who, by the way, are 150 years old, wear eyeliner like it's essential, and have family feuds that go back to the Mughal Empire. A party-loving girl dies with a love bite so gruesome that you'd faint just from the smell. Everyone is in love with someone else's brother, ex, or ghost. And the town doctor? He's probably a werewolf in denial.
Welcome to "I Love Blood," a TV show with so much drama that even the trees have backstories. It has everything: eternal romance, questionable fashion choices, slow-motion running in fog, and way too much whispering in candlelight.
And there's me, just an ordinary person, somehow caught up in this glittery, blood-soaked chaos. I'm not from this world. I don't even like this world. But guess what? I'm here. I have no idea how. There's no way out. Just vibes, danger, and one bad wardrobe choice away from becoming someone's vampire bride.
Pray for me. Or don't. Apparently, that attracts demons here.
(a satire take on The Vampire Diary)