A desire to fulfill your dream but letting yourself leaving them behind was not easy. To catch up with him by leaving him without saying a word is much painful but it was your choice to choose your dream overhim , it was your choice leaving him without saying a word, it was your choice to hurt both of you. Anyway, it is a choice that you lose but you'll gain in the end. You can comeback but you can't settle everything without pain. You can't settle everything without receiving hatred. it was you who left and comeback to begin your life coming back to him. It is your fate. You must have faith.