"You've lied ..cheated ...and shattered me in every way till this date ..but I can't help but ask that you didn't mean to say "I love you", because love wouldn't count me out ...would it? That's one question that I can't seem to escape. I couldn't live without you but now I doubt that I actually can . Confused ,not anymore at one point I thought I was wrong but you see you betrayed me Santiago! You ruined the only part of me that felt whole but that's where I'm wrong because you wouldn't be able to ruin something you built in the first place due to the endless whole that was there to begin with. I could always taste the dishonesty when you kissed me but that's what I loved the most in our moments of denial. Nothing else ever seems to hurt like the smile on your face when it's only in my memories it hurts because it doesn't hit me quite the same , maybe you should take that as a cause of concern but I'm not at ease with anything, (you , life ,myself )......I'm so brutally cold that I feel like I'm mentally dead inside and no one is there to see the tears I've cried and wipe them and tell me that "I'm there Dear Valerie and that each moment that I'm here I won't be able to make you fall."but that's the thing you aren't there Santiago I don't need to be important I've got you to let me down.Why do you let me down,you're the only one that can understand why, I've always understood why I'm not good enough but I felt something with you but I'm equally at fault for you when I see tears I start to run . I use recognize myself next to you but I've found myself dysfunctional once more without you. I didn't want to be alive and now forever more because I don't feel like my life is mine . I've waisted everyday and left much behind and you getting close to me could be dangerous. I don't want the meds. I don't want you It took time to look at you It took time for me to have an open mind towards you It took time for me to love you But it took a mere second for me to lose youAll Rights Reserved
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