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Deep Down

Deep Down

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    Parts 2
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WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sat, Sep 1, 2012
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Non-Fiction
I didn’t ask to be this way. It’s not my fault, im not a drama queen or any of the other things you call me. If you live my life for a day you will understand what I go though every single day of my life, waking up not knowing whether today you will be really depressed or on an all time high and I can guaranty you will give up even before the day ends. I tell myself everyday that things will get better but deep down I know they won’t until he comes back for me, the one ive always dreamed of. It’s not his fault that im in depression, its natures. He’s 17 and im 14 and I fell in love with him when I first met him. Seeing him makes my heart beat ten to the dozen, he is like an angel that has fallen just to capture the heart of someone vulnerable and young but when we split, I felt my world crumble beneath my feet and seeing him with his ex is killing me every time I see them together. She makes him horrible towards me when she is there but when she’s not he is completely different and I fall in love with him over and over again even though I know I shouldn’t. He’s like that chocolate cake you crave when you diet or that kid you wanna hit cuz he called you fat, you want it but your cant have it. My story isn’t fake, this is the real deal. People who take their friends for granted need to appreciate them because one day you will lose the closest and you don’t know what you have until you lose it! I have learnt that through experience. My life is an emotional rollercoaster which has an unfound ending.
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I didn't ask to be born into this world, none of us did but we make the best of it. I'm a twenty-five year old single man. Why you may ask? Because I've seen what love can do to a person. It can destroy them. My parent's are amazing but I can still remember the time's my father threatened to kill my mother, left us due to his mental illness. Besides who needs one main women when I can have a different one under me every night, money to blow and fast cars. I'm just enjoying my time until I take my Papes place at the throne. Most nights are spent living it up with my cousins who are my only friends. However there is the one girl that has caught my eye and I don't know why. I first spotted her at a random coffee house I stepped into. Usually I'm very talkative especially when I'm trying to snag a chic but I couldn't utter a word to her. I barely managed to place my order. Now, I find myself going out of my way to stop by that coffee shop everyday. It doesn't matter that it's out of my way. The only thing that matters is that I see her. I knew I could take her if I really wanted to but I can't make myself to do it. She sees me enter and shoots me that amazing smile and prepares my order without even asking what I want, she knows. She'll offer a greeting but all I can do is nod my head. She makes me lose my word's. Deep in my mind I wonder if she could be the one that could change my mind on love and that scares me. For now I'm satisfied at seeing her for the few minutes it takes to get my coffee. Besides I'm a killer, a future mob king and she's this delicate flower that wouldn't understand my world. It's best to cut my loses and move on. If only I knew her name..

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