Deep Down

I didn’t ask to be this way. It’s not my fault, im not a drama queen or any of the other things you call me. If you live my life for a day you will understand what I go though every single day of my life, waking up not knowing whether today you will be really depressed or on an all time high and I can guaranty you will give up even before the day ends. I tell myself everyday that things will get better but deep down I know they won’t until he comes back for me, the one ive always dreamed of. It’s not his fault that im in depression, its natures. He’s 17 and im 14 and I fell in love with him when I first met him. Seeing him makes my heart beat ten to the dozen, he is like an angel that has fallen just to capture the heart of someone vulnerable and young but when we split, I felt my world crumble beneath my feet and seeing him with his ex is killing me every time I see them together. She makes him horrible towards me when she is there but when she’s not he is completely different and I fall in love with him over and over again even though I know I shouldn’t. He’s like that chocolate cake you crave when you diet or that kid you wanna hit cuz he called you fat, you want it but your cant have it. My story isn’t fake, this is the real deal. People who take their friends for granted need to appreciate them because one day you will lose the closest and you don’t know what you have until you lose it! I have learnt that through experience. My life is an emotional rollercoaster which has an unfound ending.