My Unbelievably, Crazy, Active, Weird, But Awesome Sex Life

My life is pretty normal for a gay guy like me..... Well when you take the sex out of the equation.
I ask for nothing really in life, I know I'm nothing special. I live and breathe and carry on with my normal human activities.
I am just like anyone else, I squeeze in "one more" episode on super late work nights and perform full blown concerts in the shower into my imaginary mic for my imaginary audience. I even have a weird itching sensation in my hand that makes me to bite it.... no just me? Cool. But you get it right? I'm just like you...... now let's add sex into the equation. Have you ever fucked a Chaplins Assistant? Or have you went to go on a double date with a guy and his roommate only to discover that your date and his roommate are in a fake marriage for money and in the middle of discovering that they find out that they are being watched by someone who literally wants to debunk that marriage? No? Yeah well I have, and I've been in many, many weird, funny, amazing, and downright awkward sexual encounters before. And I still am currently experiencing them as you read this. It's normal to me and I've always told my stories here's and there. But never somewhere where i can publish them. So now there are here in the vast infinite world called the Internet. I'm Malachi, and this is my story