Addicted

I think we all reach a point in our lives; a point where we question the reason of it all, the reason of life or death. We all reach a point where we question wether or not we should continue on. Sometimes it hits us when we're young; others when we're old. Some people know how to come down from that, make a decision and move on with their lives as if it never happened; others don't. Others sit and morn over what feels like the lose of their own soul until the decision eats the alive.

As a child we're taught to do as your guardian says and not as they do; but what do you do when they never say anything?
*****
"Do you regret it?" Our feet dangle off of the cliff, the tips of my toes stinking from the cold air, as my hair whips around me. My brows frowned as I picked at the crushed leaves surrounding us. As if sensing my confusion he continued, "Anything. Taking those pills, running away from him- your home; any 'bad' thing you've ever done. Do you regret it?"

I watched as the fog is air escaped my mouth as I sighed, listening to the sound of the water crashing against the rocks below. Sucking in a breath as I shrug, staring ahead of us, the pitch black sky empty of stars. "Sometimes I think I do," I reason, biting the inside of my cheek. "I think that maybe the things I've done could've gone a different way, the decisions I've made might have ended differently."

"But?"

"But then I think," a moment of silence passes, neither of us saying a word; me trying to collect the thoughts inside of my brain to form a simple sentence, him waiting for the simple sentence to relieve the stress that he has been baring on his shoulders. After taking another breath, blinking away the stinging in my eyes, I speak. "But then I think maybe not."
*****
You never know how beautiful life is, how the clouds painted the sky with beautiful colors and the mountains casted their own artistic shadows around the world, until you can't see it anymore.