Quintessence
  • Reads 449
  • Votes 10
  • Parts 7
  • Time 1h 25m
  • Reads 449
  • Votes 10
  • Parts 7
  • Time 1h 25m
Ongoing, First published Jul 27, 2014
There was a time when I want to die. Just die and be forgotten. It was a scary thought, but it's also comforting. When I, Maxx-a sad, out of shape, broke, gay man- have met a cheerful, fit, rich, straight guy, I felt that there was still a reason to live. Despite our differences, we were always told that we are the same. And those similarities have given me an irrefutable amount of hope and patience. If only I can wake up.
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i wrote this when i was young and had no idea what the concept of love even entailed. the work in here is certainly not my best and while i would love to fix it, i just don't have the time for it. the stuff i've written is also quite specific and not very general for the kind of genre i intended it to be, i only made this book because it felt like there was nothing of the sort out there, though i'm not sure how that's changed since i've been gone. i've since grown and while a lot of my writing here is very amateur and, bland, so to speak, it has helped me grow and become the person i am today in a way. love is a beautiful and damaging thing at the same time, and it's taken me a lifetime worth of experiences to reach that conclusion. what's in this book is purely fictional, so i hope you take it with a grain of salt and let yourself be whisked into your imaginations rather than perceive reality as the books portray it, because it is anything but that. it doesn't matter if the person you adore isn't equally as infatuated with you, and it certainly doesn't matter if there's nothing you can do about it. love comes to those who wait and are in need of it. if you can't find it romantically, find it platonically or in your loved and close ones. just because he, she, they or whomever it concerns does not have the capacity to appreciate you, doesn't mean you don't deserve to be appreciated at all. i hope you know your worth, whoever you are. i'm happy if this book ever makes you happy, stay strong and thank you for granting me the unforgettable experience of writing this. <3
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"I think I'm gay." I say, leaving out the part about my... exposing dream about him last night. I watched his expression, waiting for some sign that he was angry. I waited for him to call me a faggot, to curse me off and tell me he never wanted to see me again. Instead, I was greeted with his perfect toothy smile. "That's great man, I'm of proud you." He says, patting my arm as he stuffed another cracker in his mouth. "It takes some real balls to come out to someone." He says, his beautiful green eyes blazing into mine. I felt myself become flustered at his gaze. "Uh, Yeah, Thanks." I stumbled out, "You're not mad?" I ask. His expression turns to hurt as he crinkles his eyebrows. "Why the hell would I be mad?" He asks, hesitating on the crackers and pushing them away. "I just thought-it's just- well... you just always seem so pissed when someone mentions the word gay." I spit out words, scared for his reaction. He sighs, "That doesn't fucking mean I hate gays. Normally when I do that it's because someone's using the word 'gay' to hate on them, it just pisses me off, you know?" He asks, bringing the crackers back into his lap and biting into them. "Plus-" He adds on, "You're my best friend, if anything, you being gay is a blessing. I'll always support you." He says, glancing at me through the side of his eyes. I look away, towards the door to hide the crimson blush that I feel spread over my face. "Thanks." I all but squeak out. And that's the day I realized, I have a faint crush on my best friend. &lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&gt;&lt;&lt; THIS BOOK IS BEING *MAJORLY* EDITED. THERES LOTS OF SPELLING MISTAKES AND NAME MIX UPS, SOME CHAPTERS WILL BE REWRITTEN Also, Please don't be mean to the characters, they aren't even close to perfect, but they don't deserve hate.
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I have always been unlucky with love huh... I'm the 'Unrequited Love Repeater' that's right. It's almost like Cupid himself hates my entire existence. I met them again. My failed romance stories. The people who made me learn from my mistake. The people who taught me how to love myself. The people who broke my heart and mend it back. The people who made my smile brighter. The people who made my heart warm. The people who took pages from my book. Pages of happiness, sadness, anger, and well... past memories. Nightmare, my childhood friend whom I had always admired when I was young. He loves me but it was the type of love I didn't yearn for. Killer, the playboy who made me laugh the hardest. I wanted him in my arms but he wanted to be in her arms. Dust, my bestfriend who I resonate with a lot. Same music taste. Same vibes. Different feelings. He fell in love with my bestfriend. Error, my 'rival' at academics. I did everything I could to acquire his love. I guess you already know who lost between us. Horror, my guardian angel. Not literally. Comfort. He gave me comfort. He made me feel special but at that time I was already too tired to even try. Cross, my online bestfriend. My feelings on him are uncertain. I don't think I'm ready to address that yet. But after all these years, I still love them. Someday I will be brave enough to mutter the words "I still love you". ___________________ ↷I have the rewritten one published! (PLEASE GO READ IT HUHU) ↷DISCONTINUED but hey you might still enjoy it :) ↷art in cover belongs to @kucingmontel on tublr !! ↷female! reader
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