lifes pain
- Reads 4
- Votes 1
- Parts 1
MatureOngoing<5 mins
Last published Thu, Oct 24, 2019
hey guys, I know this is stupid. however I know some people that were like me asked a lot of questions when it came to going through the things I went through and I want nothing more then to maybe be that person that can ease someones mind when it comes to trying to better themselves, then falling, then trying to come back up again.
so this is my story about what a roller coaster my life is and also my attempt at trying to answer some questions for people who need it.
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A Nᴇᴡ Bᴇɢɪɴɴɪɴɢ | ✓
Jane Victoria Davis, a 18 years old female, that just graduated highschool. She been doing dancing and gymnastic since childhood and still do, She is a famous tiktok creator for her flexibility. She have over 15 million followers. She is also a Instagram model with over 3 million. She took dancing as her career. She hadn't had time to spend with her friends that lived in LA. So she called and texted them daily, they havent seen each other for the pass 3 months. Her friends had a spear room for her in their group house along with 6 other people she's close to. She currently lives in a house with her mother who she is really close to, Her stepfather how she kinda hated for trying to play the role as a father in her life, Her Step sister that is a year younger than her and they are quite best buds she also graduated with her. So yea, she gets along with the females but not the males. Her father was hit by a car protecting me, he shoved me out the way getting hit instead. So he got hurt because of me, I still blame my self for it. It was my fault, even if I was only 14 at the time, it was my birthday. But yet, my mother tried her best to keep me happy during the month of my brithday, it was useless, I felt pain. Like I'm the reason this shit happened. Yet my 18th brithday was the best, I got the best thing I could've ask for, so on I been better. Still something was telling me not to feel so free just yet, Something happened that affected me and all the people that I cared for, the people I held close to me. I took the risk of death for friends. I risked my self of my problems, the reason he was here was because of me, I'm not letting anybody get hurt because of my mistakes any longer. I'm taking the consequences for my actions. For somebody from my pass caught up with me. A mistake, He wasn't suppose to be in my life at all, I didn't need him or want him any longer but he wanted me still. ____________ Started - January 26th 2021 Ended - May 23rd 2021Complete
Someone New ✓
"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Who I am doesn't matter. How I got here doesn't matter. What matters now is I'm getting help, right? That's what they tell me here. They tell me that the road to recovery feels like a terrible butt fuck, but the fact that you're on the path to begin with, is all that matters. So as I sit in this circle of fuck ups, I realize just how different I am from them. I didn't attempt suicide because my mother was a crack addict who didn't want me. My father wasn't abusive. I didn't have a sibling die in a car accident. I was never really bullied either. I attempted suicide because, for the first time in years, I thought I had found something that could make me feel again... and after not feeling much at all for far too long, perhaps I went a bit overboardComplete
Best of Friends
""Kitten, you're worried about something, and you cannae lie. You're picking at your hands and looking around to clean up my room. Unlucky for you, my room is very clean," he said, "Now what are you worrying about so much?" I stopped picking at my cuticles. It was kind of weird that he could see me doing something and read me like a book before I could even realize I was doing it. I felt my heart pound in my chest. "Well, it's just this whole pretending to date you thing," I shrugged, "How far do we have to take it? Do we have to do it in front of our friends? Do we have to do it in public because obviously we ran into Olivia today and we weren't planning on it. Oh shit, what if she sees you with another girl? I mean, what would happen then? What if she sees me talking to another guy? How long is this going to go on? What if we have to kiss in front of Olivia? I mean, it's not that I don't want to kiss you but--" I rambled on nervously. Iain smirked and walked towards me, and the next thing I knew, his lips were on mine, and we were kissing." When Kit's older brother, Ben, finally makes it with the girl he's been crushing on for four years, only to find out she's wary of family, he lies and calls his baby sister his best friend's girlfriend, turning everyone's life upside down. While Kit's struggling with the impending doom of college and parents that could divorce at any second, she's also juggling a fake relationship with her brother's hot best friend, Iain. As if that weren't complicated enough, a chemistry sparks between Iain, igniting flames and destroying the crumbling world around them. RATED M for drug and alcohol use and sexual themesComplete
Altered
Have you ever met someone who alters the course of your life? For good or for bad, they've come in, given and taken, and then- BOOM! Your life was never the same. There's always a change, an altering of reality. When you meet those people, the reality that you've known your whole life is suddenly gone and a new one has taken its place. When those moments happen, there's no going back. You can try to return to the way things were but nothing, and I mean nothing, can take you back to exactly how it was. That's what happened to us. I think that's why we're still trying so desperately to get back to some sort of normalcy. Four years later and we're still on the ground, crawling, in search of the happiness that was lost that June. Summers will never be the same. Midnight walks through my neighborhood will never be the same. Field parties with bonfires and loud music will never be the same. I still don't know why you left and what lead you to the decision you made. What I do know is that we're here. We're alive and we're pushing forward to the future. A future that you're not a part of. But in some ways, I'm glad you're not a part of it. I just wish it wasn't like this. *** TRIGGER WARNING*** SA, abuse, suicide, substance abuse, and mental illness. This is a complete story that is much like life; fast, full of surprises, and not always how we want it to be. This has been a project of mine for over three years. It was self-published on Amazon, but after some issues in publication, I decided to just upload it on here. I hope you fall in love with these characters like I have. The friends in this story are trying to make names for themselves, figure out who they are, who they can trust, how to love, and how to separate themselves from a restrictive community. As in any coming of age story, they will experience growing pains... but will they survive them before its too late? PLEASE READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS.Complete
Who We Were
It's not been an easy year. Not in the slightest. But things are slowly returning to some kind of fucked up normality I guess. Though even this is better than 8 months ago so I'll take the slight improvement. One other person's lapse of judgement has altered my life in way's I'll never really understand but this is my life now. I know I'll be okay. I have to be. 16 other people weren't okay. I was. By some chaotic otherworldly reasoning beyond my control, I'm okay. I'm ALIVE. Fucked in the head or not, I'm not letting it stop me. ~~~ Aria Clarke hasn't had the best year of her life. When one fateful night, she turns into an underpass and her car is dead center of a huge collision, killing everyone on sight but her. Almost a full year into her recovery, after spending 9 months being judged and tormented, swallowing pills to numb the effects, therapy appointments and learning to live her life with her new scars, she craves normality. Anything. Just one person to treat her how she used to be. When one of her closest friend drags her on a double date, that's the plan. Normal. Be normal. As Cameron spends his weeks with Aria, her walls crumble and she lets him in, showing him the darker side to her life and when he embraces it with open arms, things couldn't be more perfect. One accident later and Aria's world is flipped on it's head, sending her down a path that leads her 10,000 miles across the world and into the arms of her oldest friend. The years pass and with a new thriving life in her hands, Aria has a choice to make. Do you favour the people you knew in the past, or the ones who barely know the current you? After 4 years, no one really is the same as who they were.Complete
Alleys.
My name is Brianna, my father left the house and now it's me and my ma now. She's been crying and crying, worst than she use to when my father use to beat her up, he used to beat me up and try to sexually abuse his own daughter. You can't say the world is always perfect because it's not, this world is basically f***ed up. Everything they see, they wanna go and try crap but you're basically ruining somebody's life, but when that person is so ignorant, they're too dumb to even realize that they're basically saving your life. You didn't want help but you needed it and it's not to say that you tried hard, you didn't do your best. You're basically blaming the other person for your wrongs and it was the best thing that you can ever have. That person threw you out the window and you can't say it wasn't for a good cause because everything happens for a reason. I'm basically talking about myself... My ma started drugs and started to be 'a sl**' (at least that what everybody calls her out on) , she kicked me out and I knew it was gonna happen sooner or later and I surprisingly left there with pride. I was out on the streets and I met the most f***ed up person that I've ever met in my life but the thing is that, I couldn't help but fall, hard. I don't know what the hell is love but it sure feels like it... [Roc Royal Love Story]Complete
𝙰 𝚅𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜'𝚜 𝙶𝚞𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚝𝚘 𝚂𝚞𝚛𝚟𝚒𝚟𝚊𝚕...
Have you ever had one of those terrible yet annoyingly pivotal moments? You know, that monumental fragment of time that flips everything you have ever known. That plot twist second that completely takes you by surprise. The one just before the storm hits and everything goes to hell. Yes? Because you see, that moment happens to be my whole damn life. It wasn't always like this though. I used to have a pretty mundane existence, happy to just get good grades and be around my friends. God I wish I could get that simplicity back, I'd never complain it was boring again. But I know I'm not going to ever get back my old life because well... I died. (Kinda) But I woke up. And I was thrilled, beyond grateful I wasn't dead. But then I realized that there was one minor detail that had changed about my reality. I was given the chance to live but it turns out I woke up as the villainess in an otome game my friend used to be obsessed with - Kingdom of freaking Hearts (I added the freaking in there for effect, it's just Kingdom of Hearts) Where, for the record, the villainess only has two possible endings 1) execution and 2) getting exiled. So Fate was like, "Don't worry, I'll save you. Here's a chance to live" and then was like "psyche, screw you. You're still going to die but I'll let you suffer a little first." So now, if only to annoy Fate by proving it wrong, I am determined to survive. I can and I will if I play by these simple rules: 1) Befriend Heroin 2) Avoid Aryn Edwards at All Costs as well as other capture targets And 3) Be the top student at the academy and become an invaluable asset to my Kingdom so I become indispensable, thus unkillable. I'm determined, stubborn, persistent and I will live passed 16. Fate made a big mistake setting me up to die. Since it threw this plot twist at me, I figure I'll return the favor. I'll be the biggest plot twist Fate never saw coming...
Secret Mind ✓
"She's right! She's right! I don't cut in the right spot." My hold tightens on my wrist. The red blood oozes out of my wrist. I slide up and grab my bag and run out of the bathroom. I don't care if people can see the blood I just want to get out. I race for the doors and shove through people. I earn a lot of glares and glances that read "weirdo." I ignore and push. I run to my house and lock myself in my bathroom. I don't bother closing the front door cause I don't care if people come in to kill me. I grab my razor and cut deep cuts into my arm and wrists falling into a pool of my own blood. • • • Evangeline has a great life. Friends? Check! Good grades? Check! Loving family? Check! But what if she has secrets that nobody knows of? What if the only thing she can trust is her secret diary? What if slowly but surly she's dying inside? How can an innocent twelve year old deal with these problems? Will she keep on facing these problem till the day she breaks. Her school burns down forcing her into a different school to meet different people and she has to fit into a different lifestyle as well. Meet Evangeline. Now at 17 years of age in a new high school. Not all girls anymore. No uniform. Meet Drake. Your classic bad-boy. He just moved to Saint Abigail high school. He is assigned partners with the quiet, calm, unnoticed Evangeline. As time progresses he finds that she isn't as happy on the inside as she is on the outside. Can he save her? Or is it too late? • • • Some rude language. Depression and cutting. Don't say I didn't warn you. Okay, I wrote this at the start of this year (may 2016) and I had very poor writing skills. This book hasn't been edited and the whole idea is cliche so I wouldn't recommend you read it but I'm not stopping you, either. Read at your own risk. • • • Copyright © 2017 by -moonlust. All rights reserved.Complete
It Wasn't Love ✔️
"Fuck." He whispers into my neck, sending a thrill of excitement through my body. His lips still smothered kisses over my neck and his hands roamed my body, starting at my chest, going down to my stomach. Caressing my soft skin, his thumb trailed circles on my groin before slightly slipping into the waistband of my jeans. My breath catches in my throat as I pull at the hoodie that covered his chiselled body. Understanding, Jacob pulls it off in one swift movement before attaching his lips back on my neck. Sucking and biting it before flicking his tongue over the sore spot. A quiet moan leaves my mouth and I clasp my hand over it, denying any noise to escape. "You drive me fucking crazy, Aria." ---------------------------- Aria Bailey finds it hard to fit in. Her parents are always busy and never have time for her. She lives alone at her family home and has top grades in all of her classes. But being a 17 year old friendless nerd comes with its disadvantages. The bullying gets worse every single day, driving her to self harm and suicidal thoughts. Aria learns more about popular boy, Jacob Rickson and starts developing feelings for the well known 18 year old. Jacob helps her come out of her shell and learn to be more comfortable and confident. Aria has to make a tough decision by choosing if she would rather be with Jacob and be bullied by her mind for eternity, or to leave and be left alone, exactly how she wants to be. -Strangers to lovers -Right person, wrong timeComplete
The Darkest Choice | Omegaverse
"Look at how pretty she looks bent over my lap, all desperate for her mates. Isn't that right pretty little Omega? You want all your mates to take care of you, fix that ache in your core that only your mates can mend." The needy whine that escapes my mouth has all the men in the room groan with desperation. "Please King just touch her, my d*ck can't wait any longer." King doesn't wait any longer bringing his big hand down right to where I desperately want it. "How does she feel? Her scent is driving my Alpha wild, I need to touch her - to taste her." King shares a heated look with the four other men in the room, "She is just what we needed." *** Growing up in a rundown small town the broken Omega Faye has never dared to dream outside of what she knows. A chance run in with an Alpha at the gas station she works in, sets her on the course for the Omega Academy where she is reunited with her only friend who also happens to be an Omega. A rare male Omega who fought tooth and nail to protect her when they were younger - but now he is claiming she is his and getting kicked out of the academy permanently... Years later, when Faye graduates she is thrown back into her world with no pack or prospects. With no other options she must go back home to the only place she has ever known. But fate has a funny way of working and Faye once again meets her childhood best friend and supposed Omega mate, Cade. Only this time he comes along with a pack full of scary, dominating and beautiful motorcycle gang men who are also claiming she is theirs. But how could anyone want a broken omega like her when they already have one who happens to be her longtime childhood friend, not to mention its forbidden - but time is running out and with her heat on the way she is running out of options... Why-Choose MMFMMM Omegaverse Biker Romance **MATURE CONTENT**Complete
Jane Victoria Davis, a 18 years old female, that just graduated highschool. She been doing dancing and gymnastic since childhood and still do, She is a famous tiktok creator for her flexibility. She have over 15 million followers. She is also a Instagram model with over 3 million. She took dancing as her career. She hadn't had time to spend with her friends that lived in LA. So she called and texted them daily, they havent seen each other for the pass 3 months. Her friends had a spear room for her in their group house along with 6 other people she's close to. She currently lives in a house with her mother who she is really close to, Her stepfather how she kinda hated for trying to play the role as a father in her life, Her Step sister that is a year younger than her and they are quite best buds she also graduated with her. So yea, she gets along with the females but not the males. Her father was hit by a car protecting me, he shoved me out the way getting hit instead. So he got hurt because of me, I still blame my self for it. It was my fault, even if I was only 14 at the time, it was my birthday. But yet, my mother tried her best to keep me happy during the month of my brithday, it was useless, I felt pain. Like I'm the reason this shit happened. Yet my 18th brithday was the best, I got the best thing I could've ask for, so on I been better. Still something was telling me not to feel so free just yet, Something happened that affected me and all the people that I cared for, the people I held close to me. I took the risk of death for friends. I risked my self of my problems, the reason he was here was because of me, I'm not letting anybody get hurt because of my mistakes any longer. I'm taking the consequences for my actions. For somebody from my pass caught up with me. A mistake, He wasn't suppose to be in my life at all, I didn't need him or want him any longer but he wanted me still. ____________ Started - January 26th 2021 Ended - May 23rd 2021
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