"My Past Self"
- Reads 102
- Votes 6
- Parts 14
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Tue, Apr 14, 2020
In the past i used to think that WHY does everyone changes. I was never fond of new places, stuff. I never liked it. And i promised myself not to change ever. Not my habits not my favorite things. Nothing to be exact but still i guess the cruel world didn't like me being ME or the decision i made to myself of never changing.
'Everything is going to be OK' is a phrase i repeat most of the time in my head. But it seems like the magical spark from this sentence faded a long time ago which used to make things a bit at ease.
i m safe from the world's harsh reality if i didn't change, if i stopped reacting to things that i cannot handle. But nothing worked . HA! Who was i fooling anyways, i guess myself.
( EVERYTHING DID AND ALWAYS WILL CHANGE WHEN ITS TIME IS UP)
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mypast
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so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. This is for you. For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides. For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly. For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning. For everyone who never could find the words to say why. For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much. For everyone who had to pick themselves back up. For everyone who had to parent themselves. For everyone fighting an invisible battle. For everyone who has been underestimated. For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope. For everyone who found other means to silence their voices. For everyone who was silenced. For everyone who was over powered. For everyone who was made to be less. For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent. For everyone asking themselves, why? Why would you do this? What did I do? Why is this happening to me? It was never your fault.
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