I always knew

I always knew

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WpMetadataReadOngoing<5 mins
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Sun, Oct 5, 2014
While Dan deals with a deep depression, that almost nobody seems to notice, Phil deals with having a beat friend he doesn't know how to help. no matter how hard Dan tries to hide it, Phil knows everything Dan is doing, he just has no idea what to do, or even where to start. Dan believes he's doing a fantastic job of keeping Phil in the dark, and is ready to deny, deny, deny, to make sure it stays that way. *WARNING* swearing, suicidal and depressing themes, if you're easily triggered by this stuff, I recommend reading another fanfic.
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DISCLAIMER: This story is mature because it will have some self harm in it. It will also have some swearing due to that's how Dan actually talks. This is not about Phan being real. I'm sorry to disappoint you. Now onto what it is really about: Dan Howell is becoming more and more depressed. His family, his community, not even his best friend, Phil Lester, can help him. He believes he's a lost cause, and he's a mistake. He tries to hide it best he can, but some nights, it's just too much. During this, he's lost his will to smile. He'll fake smiles for videos and pictures, but he's lost a reason to genuinely smile.

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