And Then There Was Him

I had forgotten what it was like to go through everyday without feeling like there was a hole in my chest. I couldn't see it at the time, or maybe I just didn't want to, but I was broken. I was broken and no matter how hard I tried to distract myself, to find something to fill the void he had unknowingly created, I couldn't escape it. I couldn't escape the dull ache I felt ever since I lost my best friend, the one I thought I gave my everything to- my first love.

It had been almost two years since the morning I became his, and just as quickly as he let himself into my life, he was slamming the door on his way out. He had gone on a camping trip with his family and friends, and it wasn't until he got back that I could tell something was wrong. Being young and in love has an effect on people, and in the world of smartphones staying in constant contact is a given. It wasn't often that he avoided my phone calls, that was my first clue. The next was the guilt I could hear in his voice, even when all he was saying was hello. What really tipped me off though, was the excuses he made for his strange behavior. Something wasn't adding up and I didn't know it yet, but he had indulged in a little too much fun on that camping trip.

After my world blew up, I felt like I couldn't breathe. I hadn't just lost my boyfriend, but my best friend. He had betrayed me and my trust and there was no coming back from that. I was lost. I was broken.