FIRST

Dear Diary,

The sun is nowhere to be found, the sky is grey, and droplets of water are continuously dropping from the sky today. I do have a question to ask, why do FIRST loves never get the chance to be the LAST? I mean not every relationship, but why do people loving their FIRSTS ends up getting hurt? Why can't they just actually be like mom and dad? Both were each other's first loves and yet they were each other's last.

Basically, Diary, why does LOVE have to hurt? But, when I met them, I felt and learned, a lot of things.

He made me feel that I am the most important girl in the whole wide world.
He made me feel incredibly special. He taught me that crying and getting hurt is a way to prove you're true feelings. And He taught me that patience will bring you to the highest peak of the highest mountain in the world.

But why does deciding on the person you love or the person who loves you, very difficult to do? I don't want to hurt anyone, but I have to choose right? Between the person who came into my life FIRST, SECOND, THIRD, and FOURTH.

Diary, I'm struggling. But it doesn't matter who came FIRST right?