Love Means Nothing
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- Parts 2
You asked me if I was alright. I just shook my head and smiled. You asked again if I was alright. How was I supposed to say yes? When in reality I am a mess. My thoughts are consuming me whole, they are taking me piece by piece to a place I did not even know existed until now. I respond yeah, and shake my head.
That’s what I always do. I say yes when my mind screams no. I want to tell him of all people. But how can I? HE blocked me out of his life. He choose the other girl and not me. I told him I was alright, when in reality I need someone, not anyone, him to tell me it’s going to be okay.
I smile and move on. There is nothing else I can do. Ten minutes after you ask if I am okay; you can’t even look me in the eye; you can’t talk to me. I am nothing. We are slowly growing apart. I wish that we could go back to last summer. That was a great time. Begin able to talk, without tension.
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"You trust me, don't you?" he says with a smile, that smile. It had fooled everyone, even me at some point, and for the first time I want to scream with rage and shake the earth to the core. "Give me a hug," he says pulling me out of the chair that feels like a rock underneath me. I am as stiff as a board as his hands circle me, making me feel worse than dirt. His hands reach between my thighs and I want to plunge a knife deep through his chest. The only thing stopping me is, the knife is no where near. I pull back and I don't try to hide the anger in my eyes. I want him to see it. To know that I am coming for him. Rape is chanted repeatedly in my mind, reminding of the lies I just told and the false accusations I am throwing on innocent people. He's probably figured it out anyways, surely a Priest as high as he cannot be deceived. But none of that matters anymore because...... This is just the Beginning.
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