What It Feels Like To Be ME
- Reads 3,817
- Votes 586
- Parts 70
Ongoing1h 50m
Last published Fri, Jan 29, 2021
I am struggling. With my grades, with my depression, with my anxiety, and most importantly I am losing the battle with my sanity.
Read and say what's on ur mind
Fill me up with hope and words that may change my perspective, maybe even help me smile genuinely sometimes
Enjoy
And I love u ❤️❤️❤️
All Rights Reserved
#99
harrassment
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
My Barren Wife
Mpho and I have been together for eight years and married for six. We met in my third year of varsity.I was twenty one and he was twenty two. We became friends as he and my best friend's boyfriend, who is currently her husband, are best friends. I wasn't looking for a relationship. He just happened. I had broken up with my childhood boyfriend of seven years.(Yes! I said seven years but that's a story for another day) back to Mpho and I ,we built everything From scratch, the company he works for my provident fund helped him start it up with his best friend KG. I used to work as an Account at Investec Bank, I graduated with cum laudes, so I was headhunted, the world was my oyster. I wanted to go to New York and work in Wall Street for a few years then settle down. Mpho had different plans. He proposed marriage and told me nothing will change,silly naive me fell for that.I turned down New York because what kind of wife leaves her husband for a year unattended,who's going to cook for him ,clean for him and take care of his needs they said.Like I was some live in maid. Mxm!! He asked me to quit my job when business was doing well. We wanted to start a family and we were not getting lucky. He convinced me that it's my job thats giving me stress and if I was more relaxed we would probably conceive.That however was also not the case,we have spent over 800k on medical bills trying insemination and tests but we have not been lucky. My mother, as a prayer warrior, has taken me to church for prayers. Nothing happened.Other than Mpho's family giving me names and his mother disrespecting me and degrading me in front of other family members. My husband had failed to protect me or reparmend them. Instead now he has also joined in on the abuse.
Mafia's Forced Wife
Being a Muslim girl and in a conservative family with three protective brothers to care for you for your entire life....It makes you spoiled, protected and well naïve to some point. My name is Sharia Qureshi. I am a cardiologist. Saving lives gives me the reason to live. I believe that living life for yourself is easy but giving a part of it to others is something worth living for. Starting as an intern at a reputated hospital was all I wanted after completing my degree. But never in my life I expected Allah would turn my life from a free spirited girl to damsel in distress with none other than the shaitaan(devil). #################### "You never married me with my own free will. You forced me and my family into this. Allah will make you pay for this." He started laughing at my face mocking my words. Breaking me. Showing me how powerless I was in front of him. He closed the gap between us, stepping dangerously close. I took a sharp breath as he held my my hair painfully pushing my scalp back leaving burning sensation. He leaned down to whisper hotly in my ears."You are mine and only mine to give pain. You will beg me to be free." # 15 Compassion (06/21/2021) #1 Compassion (10/19/2022)Complete
Heartless Queen
I watch the red rose in between his hands "isn't it strange...a red rose on the beach!!" his deep voice causes a shiver to run down my back. I look back into the ocean... the view was so magical. "Someone told me that roses are like people" I hear him laugh at my words "no way...people are so dangerous and manipulative" his words had double meaning I knew exactly who he was referring to. My heart squeezed in pain...will he ever believe that this was not my fault. "They are much like people...they have so many colours like people" I feel him look at me "this shade of the rose represents danger...blood shedding" He stared down at the rose "pink represents love...white represents peace...yellow represents falling in love...and black represents death" I look up at him. "But Allah didn't make black rose" I look at him as he looks at me with confusion, I smile back at him "God doesn't make bad people either yet...we have so many of them" I could tell my words overwhelmed him. "Only you can turn something so beautiful...cold" Amira is a rich successful women with a shady past and no family in the present...she is known as the motherless child. She made one mistake and that was to fall for the Zaid Ali Khan a successful doctor. Follow Zaid as he falls for a heartless Queen.Complete
𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃 not edited
VERSION 1 "Do you do this with every girl you think is pretty or am I special?" "You're very special. You're my sapphire. You're my introspection and meditation" He says as he kisses my hand "I love you, Diamond." I chuckle "I love you too." Pecks my lips. "but isn't this selfish?" He squeezes my hand. "Sometimes you have to be selfish for your happiness." 40k+ words 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐍 is a travel blogger and influencer and single mother.She goes to a night club and waits for her brother to arrive. While waiting she meets 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐎 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐎. Her brother Shawn's best friend. He immediately catches her eye. She does the same to him. He's charming but stern at the same time. He's what she wants and she is what he wants. But his job interferes with their relationship and so does his best friend and her ex. 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐂𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐋 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐆𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐘 Very fast paced. VERSION 2 "What are you both doing here?" I ask them. "Did you really think we wouldn't find out? I mean honestly Diamond, do you think we're stupid?" I finally realize what this is, a confrontation. "I-I'm so-" "Sorry? save your words, Love. We aren't here for for that, we're sure you could apologize in other ways..right,Marciano?" Cyrus says and Marci nods. "What can I do?" "Lay down and let us handle the rest." ---------------------------------------------- ACCIDENTAL PREGNANCY, WHY CHOOSE? FAST PACED.Complete
As Long as I Have You
Izuku We had our entire life planned. We were going to continue to climb the ladder, get married, and have a family. But the longer we were together, the more followers we had, it all started to fade in the background. It was photoshoots, restaurant openings, trend after trend, and eventually, I had less time to see my family, less time for the things I had wanted to do. When I got a strange DM from a guy, warning me about the man I sleep beside every night, I ignored it and trusted him. But when I got ahold of his phone for the first time in years, it was hard to ignore what I already knew. Katsuki I love my life. I have great friends, a good family, a job that even on the bad days, I still look forward to. The run-down one bedroom house that three of us share isn't exactly my favorite thing, but it's home and sharing it with Denki and Eijiro makes it feel more live able than it really is. Money's tight and we don't have a lot, but we have love, loyalty, and friendship-something that's increasingly harder to come by in LA. The DM I got from an apparent rising influencer is proof of that. On top of the various platforms he uses, his entire Instagram page is dedicated to him and his boyfriend. When he DM's me, I shoot him down and even threaten to steal his man because if he won't treat him right, someone else should. ⚠️TRIGGER WARNINGS⚠️ Alcohol/Drug use Cursing Cheating Abuse SmutComplete
The American (BWWM)
"What?" Ethan says in his all too familiar deep, rude voice. Ethan has pitch-black hair, is 6 feet tall, with a solid build. His deep grey eyes are glaring at me right now. His jawline is so sharp I'm sure it can cut through anything. "You hit me, spilling my coffee all over me," I say, pointing out the obvious. "So, what do you want me to do about it?" he asks, like he's done nothing wrong. "You're supposed to say sorry," I say in a duh tone. "And why should I?" "Because that's what people with manners do." "I know that, but you don't deserve a sorry from me." "Wow. And why is that?" "Because black bitches like you don't deserve it," he says with a sneer. "I have told you times without number to stop calling me that," I say, angry at his insults. "Make me," Ethan says, taking a dangerous step closer. I don't say anything but hiss and walk past him. I don't know why I expected him to apologize. It's Ethan, after all. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ethan is a young male about to get his first degree, he might look normal to the world, but don't we all have our demons inside. Ethan has a problem that he feels hatred is the best way to cure it, but one lady proves him wrong. Adina is a beautiful young girl who is also about to get her first degree at the same university as Ethan. Adina is full of life and dislikes anyone who thinks they can bully her. Ethan is hell-bent on bringing hell down on Adina, and she is determined to shove it up all the way into his ass. They are both opposites, but they say opposites attract one other. What happens when a significant incident changes all that. How do these two different people deal with a feeling that is supposed to be forbidden to feel for each other?Complete
What does it mean to be good enough?
People expect too much of you even when you are trying your best. Society screams: "You have to put more make up on!" "Your body isn't thin enough! Oh my God, lose some weight!" "You are eighteen and still a virgin? There must be something wrong with you!" "Anxiety? Young people keep inventing God knows what to draw attention to themselves." And your parents want what is best for you. So they tell you to study really hard in secondary school, to not mix with the wrong people, to get a degree in college and work professionally. But is that really what is best for you? And how do you define wrong people? ___________________________________________________ My name is Phoenix, I am eighteen years old, and I suffer from anxiety. Every day is a constant struggle from when I get up in the morning until I lie back down on my soft, warm, secure pillow again. I did not get into college, and now I am stuck doing a Maths course until next spring. My friend and former classmates, unlike me, got into the university they wanted. They have achieved so much more than I, and I am extremely behind everyone else. My parents do not seem to understand me and cannot afford to pay for a psychologist. Going outside is scary, and facing problems on my own is terrifying, and trying to show that I am confident is mortifying and tiring. What do I do?Complete
Destined Hearts
"You planned for this marriage to happen. I can't believe you trick your friend to run away so you can sway yourself into my life. Well, all your games has come to an end. You're just a gold digger, all you are after is my money. My conscience kept telling me before the wedding that you shouldn't be trusted but I was so foolish to think other wise. This is your end Ameera " he said with so much disgust. He was looking at me like I was a tramp. I don't even know what to think again, all this is so hard to take in. All in one day " That was not how it was, Amir. I didn't marry you for your money, I swear I was only trying to help Aisha. She--" " I don't want to hear a single word from your mouth, if not I will beat the shit out of you. You desperate gold digger " What? " Amir it me, your love. You can't do this to us Amir please" I held his shirt, before I know it I felt a hot slap on my face. He slapped me?. I look up at him in shock " you slapped me? " " I'll do worst than that" his eye is empty of sympathy, it's now filled with hatred, hatred just for me. He isn't my Amir anymore, he is a stranger. A stranger I don't even recognize. I fell on the floor and broke down all over again. I'm doom, this is the end. " I Amir sani Bula divorce you, ameera, once. Pack your things and leave my house" " NOOOOOO!!. please don't do this to me Amir. Think about our unborn child please " " what did you just say? " " I'm pregnant with your child" I nod at him for him to believe me. I took the results from my hand bag close to me and hand it over to him. " this is the result" he didn't take it " I don't want you to ever utter such nonsense to me again . I know what you're planning to do, you want to push your bastard child to me after the father didn't accept it right. You think I'm a fool? You can't trick me anymore Ameera. We are done " " Add this book to your library to find out more about it❤❤❤❤Complete
𝖳𝗁𝖾 𝖡𝗂𝗅𝗅𝗂𝗈𝗇𝖺𝗂𝗋𝖾 𝖴𝗇𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖢𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖽
"Abort it." "Excuse me ?" "Abort that thing inside of you!" He shouts in my face. I put my hands on his chest, trying to put some space between us. The man didn't even budge. "I'm not aborting my baby!" I feel strong hands wrap around my throat, and the next thing I know, I'm being lifted off the floor, fighting for air. "Listen here, you bitch you will abort that child, and if you don't, I'll personally kill you both myself. I'm a man of my word. Do not test me." He spat dead calm. Elora finds herself in a sticky position when her brother was in a terrible car accident, leading to an expensive medical bill that neither of them could afford. Her parents died when she was young, leaving her brother as her sole guardian. The two had been incredibly close over the years, and she had to find a way to help him in his current position. She had no choice but to sleep with a man she knew nothing about for money to cover the hospital bill, but later found out she was pregnant. The worst-case scenario is that the father wants nothing to do with her and the unborn child. After three years of guilt, pain, and regret, the two cross paths once more, and Elora struggles to make the right decisions as he was determined to be in their little girl's life. It's gonna be a bumpy ride!! #1-rejection 18.01.2025 #1-conflict 18.01.2025 #1-mistakes 22.07.2025 •Published: Oct 5, 2021Complete
Together With You
Ocean Goldreich is the sister I never had. Or at least, her brothers put that thing in my mind. I tried my best to look at her as my very own sister and it worked... for at least these whole year, until I met her again in Finland and somehow she looked even more perfect than I remember. And finally after all these years I gave in to my lust toward her. We crossed the lines with the promise that we will be back as brother and sister again afterward. Can I do that? The answer is bullshit. How can I look at her as my sister when all I can remember from her is our nights together. But she was so adamant to keep our relationship as best friends slash sister brother. Seriously, Ocean? Drew Roderick, I had a crush on him in all my teenage life. But he broke my heart again and again when he just looked at me as his little sister. And now, when I was over him (or I think I was), he came back to me and acted sweetly intimate romantic and whatever is far from the brotherly attitude. I tried to push him away, but I couldn't because the truth is I want him more than just a brother. Can we cross the line? The line that my brothers put is so thick between us. But, suddenly things in our life changed. Now I'm a mother of a little baby, Charlene. We have Charlene now. I can't let my lust override my brain. I have Char at stake. But why did Drew act like we are really a happy family? We are far from family. Just co-parenting a baby, right? Words {[150.000-200.000]}Complete
Mpho and I have been together for eight years and married for six. We met in my third year of varsity.I was twenty one and he was twenty two. We became friends as he and my best friend's boyfriend, who is currently her husband, are best friends. I wasn't looking for a relationship. He just happened. I had broken up with my childhood boyfriend of seven years.(Yes! I said seven years but that's a story for another day) back to Mpho and I ,we built everything From scratch, the company he works for my provident fund helped him start it up with his best friend KG. I used to work as an Account at Investec Bank, I graduated with cum laudes, so I was headhunted, the world was my oyster. I wanted to go to New York and work in Wall Street for a few years then settle down. Mpho had different plans. He proposed marriage and told me nothing will change,silly naive me fell for that.I turned down New York because what kind of wife leaves her husband for a year unattended,who's going to cook for him ,clean for him and take care of his needs they said.Like I was some live in maid. Mxm!! He asked me to quit my job when business was doing well. We wanted to start a family and we were not getting lucky. He convinced me that it's my job thats giving me stress and if I was more relaxed we would probably conceive.That however was also not the case,we have spent over 800k on medical bills trying insemination and tests but we have not been lucky. My mother, as a prayer warrior, has taken me to church for prayers. Nothing happened.Other than Mpho's family giving me names and his mother disrespecting me and degrading me in front of other family members. My husband had failed to protect me or reparmend them. Instead now he has also joined in on the abuse.
More detailsContent Guidelines