reminiscence [1d au] (on hold)

"He's probably fine now, better than me anyway. They all probably are. I'm the only one who's stuck in the past, unable to move on because the memories are holding me back. I just want to forget about it, forget about him, but I can't. and sometimes it feels like a dream, but memories from a dream wouldn't hurt this badly. I have so many regrets. parts of me miss it and parts of me wish it never happened, and I'm so torn up inside."