Gerard Way x Door Knob Oneshot [Request]

Gerard Way was a rather unusual young man. Many people in the community found him odd. For a matter of months he would always sleep outside, on his front lawn, in a sleeping bag, and when he ventured inside, he would always wear a pair of gloves, always. But no one knew why.
No one saw the stares of longing that he gave. No one saw how his hand lingered a little longer whenever they touched, and how at night, he drooled and dreamed of maybe one day being able to touch and caress it's smooth, dark surface. But no, no one knew of the young man's intense desire and needs.

One day, Gerard thought, well fuck it, yolo, you know what I mean? He was an attractive young man, but he wasn't going to stay that way forever. So again he thought, well fuck it, I'm going to fuck that god damn door knob.

A/N: Incase you didn't guess, this was very much a joke that a friend prompted.