Diary From The Carrot Union
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TESTIMONIES
"Dude, the world building is top notch right from the start. It's thematically consistent, the names are zingy and attention grabbing. And we have good concise info being fed to our brains. I love your style." - @SpuriousSimulacrum
"This is great so far. Having spent years in Eastern Europe, this humour is equal parts nostalgic and poignant. You've taken the best bits of 'Animal Farm' and '1984' and turned it into something unique here. Definitely added to the reading list for this summer. Can't wait to read more. Well done." - @Mystery_Twins_LTD
"This is just such an entertaining read. Seriously, it seems like it should be on Adult Swim or something:)" - @stkingnaturally
To Moshare I came seeking fortune, but they're making me work til' I'm dead. And here I am, drunk in the side of some sort of concrete monument in this So-Called rabbit's paradise.
Let's check the news...Good! Extra slices of bread for everybody! Ummm, Carrots and cabbages have exceeded their quotas, and the Animalist Party held yet another victory parade, as the Carrot Union has won another war on Talabar Front.
And oioioi...'m just too scared to give a shit about it, as Commissar Nikita said whoever protests gets detained, sent to the gulag, and quote on quote, "And never is able to see vodka again."
Yes, yes! Funny people I hear every day on the wiretap. Stuff ranging from a guy that stole a stapler, and another guy drugging his coffee with laxative, or some kids setting off fireworks near a retirement home filled with veterans and getting shot by the Carrot Guard Bureau, the CGB
But hey, I thought I could share my story here! This place might be a shithole, but hey, who knows what the future might bring? Other than atherosclerosis from eating too much-fried cheburek
Right, to the story.
Credits to @annabellacx for editing
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#52
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The Analyst's Nightmare (Mission Impossible 4)
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Earthly takeover
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Communist Cuisine: Red Army Rampage!
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Superiority Complex ( M! Closet scumbag reader x Mystery Yandere )
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SUN DOGS
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Jane is simply trying to survive. In a world of nuclear post-apocalypse, blood-crazed Objectivists, immortality-seeking cultists, NFT-obsessed killbots, power-hungry narcissists, and nymphomaniac Anarchists. A stoic soldier with a heart of gold. How long will she go on until the past catches up with her? 10,500 words of visceral action, black humor, and extreme weirdness. The story is SUPER silly, but it has an important purpose. I'm only publishing it to raise funds for my hometown in Ukraine. As a city of 300,000 on the eastern border, Sumy was one of the first to be attacked by the Russian army. For more than a month, we suffered from airstrikes, artillery, blockades, and hunger. The city was encircled, yet it never fell. Now that Russians have retreated, we see death and destruction across the whole region. The Sumy volunteer community created a charity fund to help us survive, rebuild, and protect against the new attacks. Our website https://www.fond.sumy.ua/ lists different ways you can help the Sumy region. You can choose to donate specifically for: - Medicine - First aid kits - Optics - Communication devices - Armor plates for the territorial defense - Other needs (including clothing and food for the elderly, disabled, and most vulnerable people). Like many of you I've been a pacifist for my entire life, but now the only way to stop these horrors is to ensure Ukrainians have enough weapons to defend themselves. So if you want to help the Ukrainian army, the best way is to donate to the country's biggest charity fund Come Back Alive (https://www.comebackalive.in.ua/). Over the past 8 years, they've collected over $20 million donations and have a crystal-clear reputation. Please, donate if you enjoyed my story. And if you found it to be the shittiest thing ever written - roast me in public or in person - and I'll double your donation;) Raise the awareness! Now every penny, every word can save a life. Temporary cover by Anastasia Rey
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