Life of Uncertainty
- Reads 1,588
- Votes 312
- Parts 78
Since your love turned to poison, my mind cycles through emotions faster than a kid flipping radio channels. I've gone from level to rocky - fighting a mixture of competing emotions, each of them vying for dominance. After the reboot of sleep I am calm, the day stretching ahead with possibilities - time to get jobs done, connect with friends, enjoy nature. Yet this coping is a thin veil over trauma and even the smallest of set backs change my emotional landscape. By evening the sadness wells up, uncertainty rushing to the fore, and I know it is time to sleep. How the crazy dreams stitch my head back together I haven't a clue, it's a new miracle every night.
All Rights Reserved
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
Control
[18+] Life has never been easy for me. Starting when I was young up until now. The loss of my girlfriend destroyed me, now another girl is in my life. But things aren't that easy. ***READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED*** This contains dark themes including d3ath, SC, drugs/alcohol, rap3, s3lf harm and more. ATTENTION: I OWN ALL RIGHTS TO THIS STORY (including the book cover)- DO NOT use without permission or legal action will be taken.Complete
Rebirth of Fa Wei Lan
I am dying - it was inevitable. The poison given to me over the course of several months have spread throughout my veins and seep through my bones. I was alone. There was not one single person to hold me, to comfort me, or to cry for me... I am all alone... NOTE from the writer: I'm an amateur writer so please overlook plot holes, grammar issues, or anything else a story is supposed to have. This is my original story so... as the saying goes "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all".Complete
Altered
Have you ever met someone who alters the course of your life? For good or for bad, they've come in, given and taken, and then- BOOM! Your life was never the same. There's always a change, an altering of reality. When you meet those people, the reality that you've known your whole life is suddenly gone and a new one has taken its place. When those moments happen, there's no going back. You can try to return to the way things were but nothing, and I mean nothing, can take you back to exactly how it was. That's what happened to us. I think that's why we're still trying so desperately to get back to some sort of normalcy. Four years later and we're still on the ground, crawling, in search of the happiness that was lost that June. Summers will never be the same. Midnight walks through my neighborhood will never be the same. Field parties with bonfires and loud music will never be the same. I still don't know why you left and what lead you to the decision you made. What I do know is that we're here. We're alive and we're pushing forward to the future. A future that you're not a part of. But in some ways, I'm glad you're not a part of it. I just wish it wasn't like this. *** TRIGGER WARNING*** SA, abuse, suicide, substance abuse, and mental illness. This is a complete story that is much like life; fast, full of surprises, and not always how we want it to be. This has been a project of mine for over three years. It was self-published on Amazon, but after some issues in publication, I decided to just upload it on here. I hope you fall in love with these characters like I have. The friends in this story are trying to make names for themselves, figure out who they are, who they can trust, how to love, and how to separate themselves from a restrictive community. As in any coming of age story, they will experience growing pains... but will they survive them before its too late? PLEASE READ THE TRIGGER WARNINGS.Complete
Give me shelter
Have you ever felt so lonely you believed there was nothing left for you? Stashed away, merely forgotten. I mean you could cry and cry, yet no one would hear you. At least no one you truly once loved. Being yourself can be detrimental to others happiness, and so you down play who you are. You devalue your beliefs, your morals fall short and that hollow rock turns into your Mirror. Do you matter anymore? Would anyone care if you simply disappeared? Could you find your way out of the darkness? Look Closer is one of my favourite quotes and so I'll use it as a guide to understanding the complex characters you're about to meet.Complete
Poems of Pain and Solitude
For every person out there that was quiet, not because they chose to be so, but because they were choking in the smoke. Because their opinions were apparently not worth anything. Because they didn't know just how to say what they felt. For every person that is consumed by their own thoughts, the derision from the outside world only making it worse. For every soul that was drowning in remorse and anguish on restless nights. For every soul that says I love you in the dark and in the mirror because no one else does. For the floors we would pace while anxiety sunk its teeth into us. For the mirrors that we would break while shame echoed its laugh in our caged walls. For the hearts that would ache while loneliness was the only company. For every moment of pain and solitude in this world that feels too cruel for such young and frail minds.Complete
Me Without You
Shock. Once the shock wore off, I was confused. Then angry. You made me so angry because I felt betrayed by your choice. Your choice to leave me, leave me all alone in this dark world. I felt so angry and betrayed by your choice to desert me when you were all I had. Then I accepted the fact that you were no longer here because that's just how it was and how it had to be. I had to learn to accept the fact that life was now me without you and that was a damn hard pill to swallow.Complete
MY LIFE
THIS STORY IS ABOUT A PERSON'S DAILY LIFE...THE STRUGGLES, HAPPINESS, SORROW ETC. Warning: It might affect you, i do not want that. #8- gender dysphoria (08.06.22) #17- gender dysphoria (03.06.22) #383 - #dailylife (20.12.21) #58 -feeling (23.12.21) #504- mylife (06.01.22) #39 -feeling (12.01.22) #63-genderdysphoria (09.02.22)
CALLA
My name is Calla Lind. For 20 years, I have lived within the shadow of my beautiful older sister - chasing and holding onto an illusion of love. A love that will never belong to me... Now with this second chance of life, I won't chase after illusion. I won't rely on someone else for happiness. I will do what I want, enjoy what I do, and learn to let go. NOTE from the writer: I'm an amateur writer so please overlook plot holes, grammar issues, or anything else a story is supposed to have. This is my original story so... as the saying goes "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all".Complete
CALLA : BOOK II
My name is Calla Lind. Ever since my reawakening, I have live my life the way I wanted. I was able to be Calla, meet people as Calla, and have people see me as Calla. I had thought to let go of the past and be free of it. Now I know, letting go also means moving on. This is a continuation of the CALLA. WARNING! Viewer discretion advised: BOOK 2 contains adult content that is unsuitable for children. NOTE from the writer: I'm an amateur writer so please overlook plot holes, grammar issues, or anything else a story is supposed to have. This is my original story so... as the saying goes "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all".Complete
Suffer
Everyone suffers no matter how much we think we're alone, there maybe someone out there more disconnected from the rest of the world. If you had the power to help the other and didn't take it does that make you a bad person? If you had one chance to correct the world would you take it? If you were given one power what would it be? No matter what choice you make it will come haunting back to you. The good the bad there's a fine line between what people perceive as good and bad it's up to you to decide that.Complete
Just Grey: In a Black & White World
"But just look at the world around you, Love. There's messes everywhere with unclear answers. Don't give up yet." She told me gently. "I know, but I just wish that this was less confusing." "Well, things are gonna get confusing after a while, but you can't just stop trying. You've got to search harder for the answer; maybe it's somewhere you haven't looked yet. Someday you'll trip over a rock that's harder than this, and bandaids won't just stare you in the face. You won't know what to do. So prepare yourself for that day, baby." "I'm gonna trip over a rock?" I asked, eyes widening with worry. She shook her head, the bubbly symphony of her laughs echoing in the room. "No. I mean you're going to be in trouble one day and you won't know how to get out of it. Like this, but tougher." "You mean I'll have to go through this again? But even harder? Ugh, I won't make it." I sighed heavily. "No. I know you will. It just won't be so black and white. It'll be....in between the two." "So it'll be just grey?" She revealed her big, beautiful smile to me as if I had understood all that is right and wrong in the world. Kissing the top of my head, she whispered, "Exactly." {full synopsis inside} Rankings- #16 in juveniles #94 in newkid #241 in multimedia FULLY EDITED VERSION NOW AVAILABLE ON AMAZON KINDLE!!Complete
Voices in My Head
Pain. Agonizing pain. That's all I feel. Voices. Whispering voices. That's all I hear. I hear them over and over inside of my head. I can't escape. I can't fight back. This is my life. This is my story. And if you can give me your time, I'll tell it to you. *Warning: contains themes of selfharm and mental disorders **Completed as of 7/30/18Complete
RUYI
How can you lose something you never have? When your own mother poisons you to gain pity from others, how should you feel? Why was I, the youngest, being married off? How could I care about something that was never mine? WARNING! Viewer discretion advised: Story contains adult content that is unsuitable for children. NOTE from the writer: I'm an amateur writer so please overlook plot holes, grammar issues, or anything else a story is supposed to have. This is my original story so... as the saying goes "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all".Complete
Behind every mean girl...there's a tragedy
The average human being spends every second of his day fighting against the force of nature to see another day. But I'm different. I'm not afraid of outside forces to take my life away - only myself. Approximately 10 years ago, something happened to me. Something really bad. But I'm not allowed to talk about it. As a way to release my frustration, I give hell to my body and everyone I come in contact with - especially my parents. No one knows about what happened except the ones who did it...and Him. But he didn't stay. Now, he's back and he's not talking either. I want to stop hurting, I need to stop. Make me stop.Complete
Noah (Obsessions in Overdrive #1)
I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life. I want to be in my suit, in my coffin, in the ground and my soul to be gone. I've been waiting for 16 years, yet no sign of death opening his door no matter how many times I ring his doorbell. Yeah, I enjoy thinking about my end. Especially at moments like this... *** #1 physical #1 cuteguys #1 addiction #2 self-esteem *** Started: 7 November 2022 Finished: 18 April 2024Complete
Rebirth of Fa Wei Lan : Volume 2
2 years is short... 2 years is long... Days pass like years. Years continues on for eternity. Do you still remember the promise? This is a continuation of the Rebirth of Fa Wei Lan. WARNING! Viewer discretion advised: Volume 2 contains adult content that is unsuitable for children. NOTE from the writer: I'm an amateur writer so please overlook plot holes, grammar issues, or anything else a story is supposed to have. This is my original story so... as the saying goes "if you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all".Complete
the suicide mind
"and you left me with bad habits like cracking my knuckles and wearing your sweater because the smell of you still lingers. you left me chewing at the skin of my skin on my lips because maybe just maybe if it's gone the taste of you will be too, but the problem is i can't tear off my skin. so i'm left with the shivers down my spine when my body remembers your hands running up my back as you kissed me and it paralyzes me because i miss it. i miss you. i miss smiling between kisses because damn you just made me happy and I thought I made you just as happy because you would smile and whisper "what" but i would just shake my head and pull you close and it was real. it was. all of it. so why did you leave me? why?"Complete
A Broken Optimist
She's a lost soul, searching for Froot Loops in a world of Cheerios. Emotions. Inflicted by words, Creating signals to connect those emotions. A pang in your heart, the dull ache of love, a tedious, meaningless thing to some. The entire thing to others. Confusing, at the least. All consuming, at the most. We bundle it inside, Hide it in boxes, In the deepest crevices of our persona, Then suddenly, it burst free, tumbling into the atmosphere, filling every hour, every moment. Words convey it. Words share it. Through words, our emotions are liberated. Disclaimer: I wrote this throughout the course of a year. It had its ups and it's down in emotion. It ends on a happy note, I think. It has some overdramatic things in which my past self annoys me sometimes. But it also has some good pieces of thought. The world sucks. I can't promise that it's not going to suck, Because it probably always will. But there will be times Where the good in the world Makes it suck a little less.Complete
[18+] Life has never been easy for me. Starting when I was young up until now. The loss of my girlfriend destroyed me, now another girl is in my life. But things aren't that easy. ***READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED*** This contains dark themes including d3ath, SC, drugs/alcohol, rap3, s3lf harm and more. ATTENTION: I OWN ALL RIGHTS TO THIS STORY (including the book cover)- DO NOT use without permission or legal action will be taken.
More detailsContent Guidelines