I've been there...(part 1)
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- Parts 1
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Wed, Aug 13, 2014
Started so far at the bottom, I'm just blessed to still even be here.
Haunted by failure for 7 years, feeling worthless crying every night all kinds of fears.
Wonder if they'll miss me when my last breath leaves the atmosphere.
Have you ever felt like you were trying your hardest.
But your hardest was worsest, you were never close to perfect.
I'm sorry momma please love as I am.
I'm sorry fam I didn't fit in which ya.
I'm sorry for all the lies and all the sins I did which ya.
Even though I wasn't yours you treated me as your own.
Figured out the truth when I was only thirteen years old.
I deal with a disease that can only heal in my after life time.
I don't want one day to be my last nap time.
Please God make these demons go away.
I've had more than simple obstacles in my way.
Somehow I just can't face defeat, God got a hold on me, telling me the storm will soon decease.
But your the only one who can choose whether to stay on your feet.
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#945
still
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I'm just lying here in stillness and darkness wondering why. Why did this have to happen to my mom? We have nothing we can't even afford a house. Here I am a 14 year old boy that lives in a shelter home. Mom says one day we'll get out. But I've lost all hope. And I know my mom has no hope either. If she did I wouldn't have to hear her cry herself to sleep at night. I hate seeing her in so much pain. I wish, I could get a job. Maybe since I'm younger and a boy they'll hire me. Who am I kidding? My mom's in her 30's she's not old either. Sometimes the idiots that run this place kick my mom out for the night because she's making too much noise after hours. My mom was crying; is that too hard to understand? I hate this place. Well, tomorrow's our first day apart since summer started. They're forcing me to go to high school. I'm okay with school but I don't want to leave my mom alone in this world. Well, I guess there's a better chance of me getting a job if I'm in high school. You know there's one thing I remember my mom telling me when I was young. "Never frown; you never know who's falling in love with your smile." Words to live by. Let's hope they help me tomorrow.
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