The Perks of having Afternoon Tea
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  • Parts 12
  • Time 2h 3m
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Life's One Blessing (The Witcher fanfic) by kzy3456
19 parts Complete Mature
Geralt passed through the inn's common room and heard another strange bard singing the first song Geralt had heard about the strange Cat witcher, and Geralt hurried out. "Fucking Cats." "Well, that's just rude. We've only just met," came a stranger's voice. Geralt swirled around and his retort died on his tongue when he caught a whiff of a familiar scent just as he saw the dark brown curls and a Cat medallion. With a growl, Geralt lifted the Cat by his leather armor and slammed him against the stable wall. "What have you done to Jaskier??!" The Cat hissed. His eyes went from the white hair to the golden eyes, and ended on the Wolf medal on Geralt's chest. "Geralt of Rivia." He relaxed in an almost insulting kind of way and lifted an eyebrow knowingly. "So that's how it is." Geralt growled. "You reek of him. It was you. The songs he wrote. Where is he?!" The Cat smirked. "Well, you didn't think you were the only witcher worthy of a song, did you?" Geralt growled. "Since when does a fucking Cat travel with a bard?" "Why not?" the Cat said, mock puzzled. "He's charming, and he was writing songs about me, making me sound so heroic. It's been nice to share the Path with someone. The Path, the ale... and the bedrolls." ... After the whole mess of the dragon hunt, Geralt of Rivia has lost a lover, gained a daughter, and now his bard was singing songs about another witcher. Wait, what? *His* bard? Where had that come from?? -- This fanfic is set in The Witcher Netflix TV series, after episode 6 of season 1. It ignores season two almost completely and sets Geralt on a merry chase to self-discovery and his nemesis: talking about his feelings. Warnings: the story contains rude language, canon-typical monsters and violence, nudity, shameless ogling, mild-to-medium angst, and dysfunctional relationships. Image source: https://www.deviantart.com/yakichou/art/Geraskier-852512449
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Bard of Surprise

7 parts Complete Mature

Geralt hesitates. He's seen the kind of shit the law of surprise can conjure up for people. He really doesn't want to risk it, but at the same time...he really needs the money. He sighs. "Fine. I will accept the law of surprise and return in a month." "Excellent. The reports should come in some time around--" "My Lord!" From the front doors of the manor, a servant is running towards them looking panicked. "It's Master Julian!" She stops as she reaches them, panting. It looks as though she'd run all the way here. "What happened, Agnes?" The Earl demands. "Is my son alright?" Agnes shakes her head. "He's presented, my Lord. As an Omega. He's going into pre-heat!" The Earl's head snaps in Geralt's direction, his eyes wide, no doubt connecting the dots the same time that Geralt does. "Fuck."