BeSt BoOk eVeR
- Reads 417
- Votes 42
- Parts 15
ib: @arcticstars
This is just a cringy short story that is basically a wattpad mashup. Enjoy!
P.S: This does not mean to offend or mock anyone or any ethnic group. It's purely to make fun of typical Wattpad cliches. Also, the lack of grammar is not accidental.
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mashup
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Language
There is nothing more beautiful than watching an innocent angel fall apart at my sinful actions. I'm going to ruin her. •••• "You know," she whispers, "Everyone would be disgusted by the things I would let you do to me." I smirk. She's made for me. "Tell me," I said, "Tell me what you would let me do." I rub my thumbs across her cheeks. She grins up at me, looking so fucking pleased with herself. "Can I show you instead?" -------- Amorette Ávila is just trying to support her family and make something of her life. She meets a man who changes her perception of all things. Augustine Eros is a dangerous man, one who kills and controls crime, and that scares her. She wants to look out for her brother, but that only leads her closer to the man she fears. However, he finds something in her he's never found before, and he's addicted. She sees through his rough facade, and her curiosity seems to drive her interest. She's an angel to him, and he thrives off of it. She is his drug, and he wants to overdose on her.Complete
The Adventures Of An Aromantic Asshole (In A Shockingly Cliché World)
Okay. So, let's all just agree that some stories can be pretty cliché, right. I mean - do you wanna tell me you never been reading a story and thought "yo, what the hell, that makes no sense, people don't act like that in real life, what's up with the cliché thing, damn."? Yeah, it's that feeling we're going against here. So this THING, whatever it is, will feature all your good ol' clichés, but from an aromantics point of view. Or just call it a parody or something, I dunno. You do you. Nice talking to ya. Same time next week?Complete
My Favorite Wattpad books
Hiya! I would just like to recommend a few books to all you wonderful people, in hopes that you will share my opinion. The entire books on here, in my opinion, are some of Wattpad's best books and YOU HAVE TO, JUST HAVE TO READ AT LEAST ONE OF THEM!! All the books are Romance and a few contain Comedy. Take a look and choose what catches your eye (Even though you should never judge a book by its cover!!) Hope you like it! ~ Lily xoxox P.S - If you've already read a book please comment what your thoughts were!! P.S.S - These are all in no particular order, its just the way i read them. :) "Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book." ~ TFIOS, John GreenComplete
The Chronicles of Alpha Academy (bxb)
In the Montana wilderness is a very special school. Only a select few are asked to attend. Getting a top notch boarding school education is only a small part of this singular institution. In the end, only one student will be on top. WELCOME.....to Alpha Academy! Hopefully you'll read this far into the book description to discover this is my tongue in cheek (literally!!) satire of all classic Wattpad gay werewolf books. Every single exaggerated and silly aspect of this genre will find its way into these next pages. BUT....I will write it as seriously as I can, and with as much heart and love and respect for my characters as I aim for with every book I create. Just be aware, it's meant to be funny. Hopefully....Complete![Seriously, WHAT'S HOT? [√]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/575365-256-k189089.jpg)
Seriously, WHAT'S HOT? [√]
Written when Wattpad had a 'What's Hot' list - a satire of all the cliche plots woven into one story line - Werewolves, adopted hot brothers, arranged marriages, vampires, fan-fic, gangster love, plus much more... it's a rollercoaster of a plot!Complete
The Billionaire Mafia Boss Alpha Bad Boy and Me
A parody... except it slowly gets less satirical as I get way too attached to the characters and turn the story into a shipping-fest ~~~~ "Why are you doing this?" I whispered. He slammed me against another locker. I could see anger, sadness, envy, happiness and lust in his teal green orbs. "Because you're mine." He smirked, gnashing his teeth against mine. ~~~~ Brynn Winters is a 17 year old good girl. She is sweeter than sugar. She is also sarcastic and quirky and innocent and naive and snarky and is a bookworm and not like other girls. She also has trauma to (barely) compensate for her lack of personality. She believes in love but she has never experienced any, until she met him. Ryder Daniels is a 18 year old bad boy. He is sweeter than sin. He is dark and mysterious and plays football (not shown in book). He smokes and drinks beer. He is a ladies' man and a player. He has walls around his heart and some dark secrets that is definitely not spoiled in the title. He does not believe in love. Brynn and Ryder are opposites. So what happens when they meet? He is not who she thinks he is. Will it end in disaster? Or will it end in love? Will it end in flames? Or will it end in a different kind of flame? As disasters come their way, will they choose love or not love? Will their secrets drive them apart? Or will they trust in each other? Join them on their journey of love. There will be love, annoying sluts, conversations that doesn't pass the Bechdel test, cliche tropes, glaring plot holes, subtly glaring plot holes, socialism, orbs, humor, secondhand embarrassment and the tiniest hints of homoeroticism. ~~~~ Reviews (aka criticisms that I'm too lazy to correct): "From a horribly done parody to horribly done leftist propaganda." "Brynn and Ryder are the most frustrating couple I've ever read." "Where humor" "You can't use parody as an excuse for bad writing, you know."Complete
The street-fighting nerd
Meet Raven Night. She's 17. At school, she gets bullied because she's a "nerd". No one knows her past and she tends to keep it that way. During the day she is the nerd of the school. But at night she is the infamous street-fighter and racer, "Diablo". When she's not fighting or racing, she is the assassin "Death". Here's a little bit of her past, when she was 7 she watched her family get murdered in front of her. After that, she was sent to foster home after foster home. She was adopted by a man when she was 13. He is part of the second-most dangerous gang in the world. He hurts her for fun but she's afraid to try and stop him. Now meet Jacob William. He's 18. He and his other two friends just moved to town. When Jacob and his two friends(Michael & Caden) first arrived at Rosewood high, Raven was away on a mission. Jacob is a gang leader while Michael is his third-in-command and Caden is his second-in-command. Jacob had a dark past so he's cold to anyone that's not friends or family. Will Jacob and Raven open up to each other or will they hate each other? Find out in The street-fighting nerd. ⚠️⚠️This story has mature language and scenes. There will be murder and gore in this book. I will have LGBTQ+ people in this book. If you do not like this, DO NOT READ IT.⚠️⚠️ You have been warned.Complete
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It's A Cliche
Hey kids. Do you love watpadd? Are you tired of cliche's? Do you just want to read something funny? Well here's the book for you. Its a humourous parody for watpadd cliches. All you have to do is check it out. You'll fall in love. She was a storm; not the kind you run from, oh no... The kind you chase. ••• What is this idiot doing? He's making a scene, people are staring. Oh God please kill me now. I close my eyes and pray; Oh God just let the ground open up and swallow me... Pretty please? I peek from one eye to check if I've magically teleported... Nope! Still in this nightmare. "will... You... Marry... Me?", he stops singing and looks at me hopefully. Tristan why?! Why you gotta be so weird all the time? I look around to see the crowd watching wide eyed. Some look at me expectantly while the others look like they're about to cry due to this sham of affectionate 'love'. Oh what do I do now? "Tristan... We're in -. "She said yes!" they all applaud ecstatically. 'I hate people'Complete
Toxic||COMPLETED
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There is nothing more beautiful than watching an innocent angel fall apart at my sinful actions. I'm going to ruin her. •••• "You know," she whispers, "Everyone would be disgusted by the things I would let you do to me." I smirk. She's made for me. "Tell me," I said, "Tell me what you would let me do." I rub my thumbs across her cheeks. She grins up at me, looking so fucking pleased with herself. "Can I show you instead?" -------- Amorette Ávila is just trying to support her family and make something of her life. She meets a man who changes her perception of all things. Augustine Eros is a dangerous man, one who kills and controls crime, and that scares her. She wants to look out for her brother, but that only leads her closer to the man she fears. However, he finds something in her he's never found before, and he's addicted. She sees through his rough facade, and her curiosity seems to drive her interest. She's an angel to him, and he thrives off of it. She is his drug, and he wants to overdose on her.
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