GREENLIGHT

"Look I know what it feels like to lose someone you love, Smoke. You saw that demon inside me when I came home to my mama laid out on the concrete with six bullet holes in her body, that shit scarred me for the rest of my life and after that night I'm still convinced that even after 7 years I'll never be the same. Someone hated my mama so much that they ended her life not giving a fuck that she had three kids to raise and another one on the way. When that nigga took my mama's life, he took my baby brotha's too and I wasn't there to protect her. What the fuck was I gone do at 12 years old? Ain't shit that I can do that'll bring my mama back, but I promised over her grave that I was going to find the nigga who did it and best believe I did. That pain and rage that you're feeling doesn't go away overnight, it's time for you to let that shit out so we can start that healing process together, man." Kevin held me tightly, offering me his shoulder to cry on and for some odd reason my tears wouldn't fall. I felt so empty and numb, almost as if my soul was nonexistent. Them bitches ripped my heart away from me in the blink of an eye and although Kevin and Reece were here to help me through it, I needed to find out who did it. I wanted their blood in my hands for what they took from me and I don't give a damn if it ruins my future because there is no future without my other half. I just wish that it was me and not her. I wish that I was there to protect her. I wish that she would've fucking listened to me when I told her to stay put, but she was hardheaded and now my daughter has to grow up not knowing where her mama is. I felt like it was all my fault, if I wasn't so caught up in the streets my baby would be here right now.