Another Boy, Another Planet

The Doctor (James) and his bewitching Companion (Michael) think they're going to have a day-trip to CherryBomb, planet of ice-cream sodas and performance cars. Except James crash-lands on Amore, Planet of Sex, instead.

HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN?

Notes:
Considering the sex-pollenish nature of the premise, there is NO NON-CON OR DUB-CON involved.
Title mangled and borrowed from The Only Ones' 'Another Girl, Another Planet'.

River Song is quasi-Timelord material and can regenerate, right? So I'm thinking she's basically Anne-Marie, here, who would look very well as a space-pirate.

Congreve reference whipped from Mary Stewart, she wasn't doing nothing with it. Also Whitman.

Muvverfucker, the fic that would not end. Finally done.

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