Jonathan and Cole are starting college. Cole is nervous, excited, and ready to meet new people. Jonathan is alone in his room, trying to overcome his obsessive thoughts and panic attacks and fears about meeting new people. Cole spends his first night with a wild group of new friends. Jonathan spends his first night typing endlessly on his computer, trying to talk himself through his anxiety and self-hatred. Everything changes, one day, when Jonathan overcomes his negative thoughts and agrees to go to a party with Cole... where he sees her for the first time.
A story about mental illness, college, love, memories, and death.
"Somewhere, close by, there must be something better than what I have here. There is something else out there for me than what I see coming toward me. Something beautiful, something worth living for. The greyness of my life will transform, suddenly, and the sun will burn through my soul and bring me to where I am supposed to be. Something like that will happen. It has to. "
There's this silence between us that stretches longer than it should, and it wraps around my chest like a weighted blanket.
My throat tightens. I stare at him like I'm trying to memorise the face of someone who shouldn't exist. A dream made real.
My lips part before I can stop myself. "Were you sent by my dad to take care of me?"
The question hangs in the air, trembling like the last leaf in autumn. Aiden's gaze softens. His lips tug into the gentlest smile I've ever seen. It's the kind of smile that could mend broken wings.
"No" he whispers.
"I volunteered." The words hit harder than I expect. Like a punch wrapped in silk. I gasp, air leaves me in a rush I can't reclaim.
But before I can fully process what he's just said, he takes a step closer. His fingers ghost over my cheek, brushing away a tear I didn't realise had fallen. And then-he kisses me painfully slow.
His hand cups the back of my neck, anchoring me to a moment I never want to end. And just when I think it's over, he pulls away just enough to look at me.
His thumb traces the damp trail of tears down my cheek. He doesn't say anything. He just leans in again, and kisses them away. One by one.
My tears.
My pain.
My silence.
All kissed away by a boy who didn't come to save me because someone sent him.
He came because he chose to.